h a l f b a k e r yIt might be better to just get another gerbil.
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It shoud have a polished mahogany case wth brass fittings and
rosewood inlay, a large Watts governor on top, a brass bell or gong,
and a sign that says "The .End Is Nigh" that rises behind a bevelled
glass panel, like an old fashioned cash till. |
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At night, a clockwork mechanism ignites a tiny acetylene flame to
illuminate ther case. |
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Router reset initiated by a big "We-belong-dead" dual pole knife
switch, with a brown Bakelite handle. |
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Comes complete with a brass oilcan, a tin of carbide, and an order
form for Rentisham's Flenting Wax. |
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Doesn't your router have a light that is either on or
off indicating if your internet is out or not? |
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Of course when the connection goes down, you are all cut off from me, I don't how you can bear it. |
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We assume you're on some sort of major neuroleptic anyway,
probably administered by force. And when you go away, we can
contemplate ceasing to consume the blend of sedatives, tranquilizers,
and anti-depressants that alone make communication with you
almost tolerable. |
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Ohh..you say the sweetest things :-) |
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//blend of sedatives, tranquilizers, and anti-depressants |
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I've been toying with the idea of building one of these. Also included is
a switch to turn off the internet when annoyed with the kids. And
perhaps a row of timers with an old fashioned knobs that anyone can
understand and use. No more setting up "policies" and "MAC address
filters" and "IP addresses" that I'm pretty sure nobody except
engineers and IT professionals understand. Been thinking about this
for years to help my technology challenged neighbors who pester me
constantly to set up their routers. |
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Clarification: the knobs are like egg timers; one per computer or
device. Up to maybe eight hours each. |
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