Philae 2061: Sploshdown

Let me start by saying that I salute traditional Birdman events, in which incurably hopeful people throw themselves off the end of seaside piers while strapped to the world's least aerodynamic contraptions. However, I can't help feeling they're a bit yester-century.

Let's up the ante by moving from catastrophic amateur flight to calamitous amateur space exploration, with the inaugural 'Spolshdown'.

What's sploshdown? It's a gathering of like-minded astrothusiasts finding ingenious ways (trebuchet, elastic under tension, brute strength and will power etc) of launching washing-machine-sized satellites (or Philae- sized washing machines) towards the passing Halley's Comet, in the hope that a timely gust of wind or an unusual disturbance in the time space continuum will help it on its way.

First person to land their washing machine on the comet wins a crate of pokey West Country Ale, and a sponsored T-shirt. We've got until 2061 to plan this, people. Let's make it happen.