h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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(prompted by an annotation in "new ideas via concatenation")
To 1/2 bowl of existing phone software, add:
1/2 gallon speech-recognition,
1 1/2 kg next-generation grammar-correction,
2 1/2 units of software to decipher and re-constitute voice timbre.
Mix well, bake for half a
day at one-half degree (Celsius or Fahrenheit, it doesn't matter which). Slice into halves and serve with a demitasse of half-and-half.
Now whenever the pedant's friends call, they will all sound like perfect masters of the language. Software is not required for outgoing calls, since this is, after all, a pedant's phone.
[link]
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....do pedants really have friends......????? ;-) |
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UB, thanks for spotting the typo (on Fahrenheit). Phone is an accepted spelling without the apostrophe, though. |
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Can I sound like Daniel Pinkwater? Then I'm all for it. My highschool english teacher will be so proud... |
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(sirrobin and others not tuned to the USians Nation Public Radio: Daniel Pinkwater is a humorous author-fellow with impeccable grammar.) |
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Believe it or not, despite not being USAsian, I have heard
of Mr Pinkwater. |
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sirrobin and UnaBubba (and everyone else): sorry, didn't mean to insult your polycultural sophistication. I wasn't sure how global Mr. Pinkwater had become. |
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Actually.... I think you'll find.... As a matter of fact... To hell with the pedantry! Why can't they just put up with grammatical errors etc like the rest of us? I mean... RANT FILTER ON. Sorry, nearly lost it there. |
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<HBpedant> "Knucklebutt" </HBpedant> |
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Not only had I not heard of Daniel Pinkwater until yesterday (although I figured him out from the context), I hadn't heard of NPR until just now. Radio station, I guess. Context = [missing]. |
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