h a l f b a k e r yCogito, ergo sumthin'
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Soon-to-be required on all new vehicles, is the P.I.T. Stop motorist net-work by Mike-D enterprises.
Tired of driving like a courteous and fair-minded motorist, only to be screwed over by a self-centered jack-ass? With P.I.T. Stop, the multitude of mild-mannered motorists can take back the streets!!
Each
vehicle is fitted with a small touch-sensitive in-dash screen which displays every other vehicle within a half-mile radius (utilizing radar-screen-esque blips to represent other vehicles). Tapping on a car's "blip" will open a dialouge window providing the following three options:
Soft Stop -
The "Soft Stop" will tag a vehicle for five minutes. If 4 or more other motorists initiate a soft stop on the same vehicle, then a P.I.T. Stop will be initiated on the offending vehicle. The offending vehicle's operator will be notified that they have 2 minutes to find an appropriate place to park their vehicle before the engine is disabled for a 5 minute "time-out".
Hard-Stop -
The "Hard Stop" will immediatly initiate a P.I.T. Stop on the offending vehicle, as well as initiating a P.I.T. Stop on your own vehicle. Both initiator and initiatee will be notified that they have 2 minutes to find an appropriate place to park their vehicle, at which time the vehicles will be disabled until a law enforcement officer (automatically dispatched) arrives on scene.
Cancel -
This option will most likely be used when the operator accidently taps the wrong blip. The operator should consider purchasing the P.I.T. Stop propriety stylus (available through the Mike-D Enterprises web-site) for an amazingly low price of 19.99USD.
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Annotation:
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Hard day on the road, [Mike] ? |
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Of course you're kidding. Either that or you've developed a sudden taste for authoritarian intervention in your life. |
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No... just enamored with the thought of giving motorist a way to deter that *one ass-hole who flys down the side of traffic, utilizing an ending lane all the way to it's terminus before butting his way back into traffic. |
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The Soft-Stop would be such a deterent.
The Hard-Stop would be for scenarios such as seeing a drunk driver or a motorist attempting to flee the scene of an accident. |
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So, for $19.99 I can buy a device which will enable
others to stop my vehicle? |
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Also, insofar as traffic follows fluid dynamic laws,
drivers should use a closing lane all the way up to
its end-point for the most efficient net flow. Of
course, the system gets messed up by courteous
drivers who leave the soon-to-be-closed lane
empty. The solution is not to specify in advance
_which_ lane will be closed, thereby leaving equal
volumes of traffic in each lane up to the closure
point, at which point the traffic zippers as
necessary. |
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Traffic does have a few dissimilarities from fluid dynamics insomuch that it is not ok for the vehicles to touch each other, nor is it ok for the vehicles to touch the "container". |
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The traffic should use the distance between the ending lane's terminus and the point at which motorists are alerted to the lane ending in which to merge. |
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Most do. Some, however take it as an opportunity to pass a few dozen people. When they do so, they cause a magnified slowing towards the tail end of the merging traffic when they force their way in, due to reaction-time delays. |
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(and the *stylus is 19.99... The system is mandatory) |
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//The traffic should use the distance between the
ending lane's terminus and the point at which
motorists are alerted to the lane ending in which
to merge.// |
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No no no. If everyone merges at the signpost (ie,
at the first opportunity), then that leaves one lane
completely empty between the signpost and the
merge-point. And an empty lane is a wasted lane. |
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Since people have to merge at some point, it
would make most sense for everyone to merge just
before the lane closure. If everybody did this,
then it would not be at all rude; and nobody would
be unfairly disadvantaged; and the overall traffic
flow would be at least as great, if not slightly
greater. |
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There should be a law preventing people from
merging until the last, say, 300m. |
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Even in your unrealistically utopian take on merging...
the aforementioned distance between alert and terminus would still have to be used to adjust speeds such that safety-distances and other cars were not violated when merging. |
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You should really leave the traffic related contemplation to your chauffeur, [Max]. I feel you, ensconced in the leather accoutrements of your private limo, might be out-of-touch with the realities of piloting of vehicle. |
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//unrealistically utopian// |
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I pride myself on being unrealistic. I find it's the only
way to survive all this reality. |
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