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New Homes for 302,625 Ghosts

  (+16, -2)(+16, -2)
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There are according to some figures as many as 302,625 houses lying empty in the Republic of Ireland (see link if you don't believe the figure)

Without going into too many details, the Irish went a bit mad with all of the billions of Euros they got off Europe, and embarked on an unsustainable building spree, with the banks lending loony amounts of money to all and sundry.

The results are there for all to see, and they are called Ghost Estates. There are hundreds of them scattered throughout the country and no one really knows what to do with them, except me of course.

I propose making them available to the thousands of homeless spectres, ghosts, poltergeists, etc, who are routinely driven out annually by exorcisms across the world.

A simple register would list the properties available for undisturbed haunting, and any certified exorcist would be able to purchase the deeds at a reduced price as part of their work to re-house these now homeless spectres.

Each estate would be suitably fenced off from public admission and declared occupied by malevolent spirits of every variety. The Irish are a superstitious lot, and it should keep most of them out. A few scare stories (backed up by punitive fines of course) will add to the effect.

Meanwhile, the houses will simply be allowed to rot... providing valuable shelter for endangered bats, barn owls and other creatures. Tourism will flourish for those brave enough to spend time in one of the properties made available on each estate for this purpose, as part of a new "haunted house holiday" venture, with each visitor receiving a certificate detailing the ghost of occupation and she/he/its previous record and exorcism.

All-in-all, everyone comes out happy from this solution. The houses get used; some money gets raised; wildlife get protected shelter; a new tourism venture flourishes; and if you believe in ghosts, then they get new homes, and plenty of time to plot a suitable welcome for any foolhardy visitor.

xenzag, Oct 22 2010

Ghost Estates in Ireland http://www.irishcen...ates--82080852.html
there are google maps of these places too [xenzag, Oct 22 2010]

One Ghost Estate http://uk.reuters.c...UKLNE66T00M20100730
the description is perfect [xenzag, Oct 22 2010]

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       [xenzag], this is utterly brilliant... and the timing couldn't be better, being as we are on the cusp of All Hallows' Eve. I regret that I have but one bun to give [+].
Grogster, Oct 22 2010
  

       If a chain rattles in a housing estate, when there's no-one around to be frightened, does it make a sound?   

       Haunting empty properties takes all the fun out of it.   

       [ ]
Twizz, Oct 22 2010
  

       Do they have to be Irish ghosties, or can they just slip through immigration control, unnoticed?
infidel, Oct 22 2010
  

       There are all kinds of local ghosts, and strange little creatures already residing in Ireland, including Banshees, Pixies, Little People, and of course Leprechauns, but world travellers are needed to fill the vacant properties.
xenzag, Oct 22 2010
  

       I have to wonder how the native spirits of Ireland will take this. Will they embrace immigration and work to assimilate the newcomers into the Irish landscape? If so, this might work nicely. If not, I dread the resultant poltergiest activity.
gisho, Oct 22 2010
  

       Let's not forget the Poltergeist Irish Republican Army; The Ulster Deceased Force and, of course, Unseen Fein.
infidel, Oct 22 2010
  

       Brilliant, you little ghoulish thing you!
blissmiss, Oct 22 2010
  

       /Unseen Fein/   

       that is good.
bungston, Oct 22 2010
  

       What bungston said.
doctorremulac3, Oct 23 2010
  

       Will there be color-coded orange and green sheets for the new spirits?
ye_river_xiv, Jan 09 2012
  

       Bands won't play no more
(Too much fighting on the dance floor) [+]
TolpuddleSartre, Jan 09 2012
  

       When the plumbing in an Irish house needs work, do you sing Danny Boy because of that part about the pipes, the pipes are calling?
luxlucet, Jan 09 2012
  

       But more to the point, can you repossess the possessed? or the dispossessed?
luxlucet, Jan 09 2012
  

       [TolpuddleSartre], do you remember the good old days before the ghost town?   

       We danced and sang, and the music played inna de boomtown.
normzone, Jan 09 2012
  


 

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