Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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There goes my teleportation concept.

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Musical Trees

For eco-groupies.
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I have noticed while walking in the woods that occasionally when I come upon a tree that is hollow, whether alive or dead, I can knock on it at different heights on the trunk and produce a simple melody. Due to the height of the tree, and it being hollow, the sound produced actually travels a very long distance, something like a humongously scaled xylophone.

I suggest somehow producing a tree that would grow to be hollow but not dead. This could be used as an instrument (not portable, obviously; one would have to be grown in public places) or as a method of communication for miscellaneous purposes. The players of these massive musical instruments would learn to quickly scale up and down the tree, probably with a special device - they would serve as a secondary percussion player, and would most likely be more for show than for the actual music. Although these would be more of a novelty than anything else, it would at least help in a small way to work with instead of destroying the forests we are constantly mutilating. Tree-huggers can now become tree-players.

Pseudonym #3, Mar 31 2002

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       if they are grown in a big enough pot (possibly with wheels) there is no reason why they shouldn't be portable. do they have to be very large? wouldn't bonsais (sp?) do this? can we have wind chimes in the branches and then something for the string section... hey I like this croissant for you PseuD.
po, Mar 31 2002
  

       Actually, I hadn't thought of that, but I suppose the whole tree could have several other instruments also.   

       As for transportation, it would be theoretically possible, but very difficult. How would you get it under a bridge? Also, bonsais would take forever to develop, and would not be large enough, unless you somehow produced a hybrid that had a quicker growth rate/size.
Pseudonym #3, Mar 31 2002
  

       Bonsai's are not hybrids, generally. They are just regular ol' specimens (with a couple of exceptions, including dwarf pomegranate) that are kept small by continual pruning and restraint--artificial dwarfing. So, they wouldn't take any longer to develop than any tree.
bristolz, Mar 31 2002
  

       Haven't you ever seen an old jungle movie?
"Those drums, those drums, those incessant drums! They're driving me mad, MAD I tell you!"
<Later, drums stop.>
"I don't like it. It's too quiet."
StarChaser, Mar 31 2002
  

       the moderators are restless tonight, Pseud. keep downwind of them.
po, Mar 31 2002
  

       And the guy with the pencil-thin mustache, Puttee helmet and Jodhpurs (spl.) looks where the guy had been and says, "Poor devil.", as the guy goes spinning away, screaming, into the darkness--taken by the unseen forces of the jungle that do not like his incessant, obsessive drumming on the hollow tree.
entremanure, Apr 01 2002
  
      
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