h a l f b a k e r yNaturally, seismology provides the answer.
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Instead of the mouth-breathing dolts typically engaged as checkout operators, the checkout position is occupied by a human-sized Muppet.
Since Muppets are motivated by an arm shoved up their rear, as far as the elbow if not further, they would be just as, if not considerably more, effective than
the current system.
self service checkout
http://www-03.ibm.c...self/sco/index.html
[mouseposture, Feb 21 2010]
Muppet shoppers
http://www.youtube....watch?v=z4YF2sQB8XE
[Amos Kito, Feb 21 2010]
for [8th] here's your muppet worker...
http://www.mopo.ca/..._440x617-795500.jpg
[xandram, Feb 23 2010]
Meh!
http://www.youtube....EA577A3A79&index=12
[DrBob, Feb 24 2010]
Hrmph!
http://www.youtube....?v=VDYsipu7KZQ&NR=1
[DrBob, Feb 24 2010]
Blech!
http://www.youtube....?v=7pCW0bd-gH0&NR=1
[DrBob, Feb 24 2010]
[link]
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could one arm up a muppet manipulate the two muppet arms required to check out goods on a conveyor belt? |
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If a midget in a cupboard can operate the controls of a chess-playing "Turk", the answer would have to be yes. |
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//could one arm up a muppet manipulate the two muppet
arms required to check out goods on a conveyor belt// |
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Considering the move towards a "self-service" (i.e. "no
service") checkout with no clerk at all I don't see how a
one-armed muppet could be any less effective than that. |
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I choose to take this idea seriously (i.e. not a rant):
puppeteers could crouch behind the counter at the self-
service checkout line, and stage Punch & Judy shows, or
whatnot. I imagine apprentice puppeteers would like the
ready-made audience -- with low expectations, and very
high turnover -- for working on their act, the customers*
would be amused and, perhaps, pleasantly surprised, and
the store would get lots of free publicity. |
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There are technical problems to get around (how to deal
with unruly kids or irascible customers) but basically, I
think it's sound. However, no bun until you explain how
explosives come into it. |
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*not [8th of 7] obviously, but the human customers. |
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[19thly] how many arms does the small person in the cupboard have? |
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// explain how explosives come into it // |
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The tobacco kiosk attendant is Animal ... |
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Check operators where I take my mother on her weekly shopping trip are funny, caring, helpful and seem smart enough to me. |
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We prefer taciturn bordering on surly - but quick, efficient and competent. |
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[Po], slightly higher than the mean number, like most of us. If a small person in a cupboard can control a puppet well enough to play chess expertly without that task interfering significantly with their abilities, they could do this. I'm unaware of how it was done, but it was. |
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As [mouseposture] pointed out, self-service exists, so this would be an extra, if anything. It could even be an illusion that the cashier was doing anything useful at all (yeah, yeah). |
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Here's my thought then: the muppet sits on a swivelling stool linked by gears to a person lying in a compartment under the conveyor belt, who can see what's going on through a periscope. They control the muppet's arms using a pantograph which is hinged, so they can also raise and lower the hands. The items and the hands contain magnets, allowing them to adhere to the muppet. The operator can shake them off using the hinge on the pantograph. |
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How do real muppets work? |
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No, they'd attract shoppers and keep them browsing in the shop until they finished. |
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[+] for the musical interludes. I once went shopping in a big mainstream supermarket that was playing a selection of radical traveller protest indie folk-rock over their PA system. |
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[pocmloc] yay for good music! I think if the store owner's would pay more attention to those kinds of things, it would be a better shopping experience and indeed maybe make more profit!
I would give this idea a bun only if I could get Oscar the Grouch and they did all the voices! |
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Statler and Waldorf close on hand to yell at the fat
people buying the super-ultra gigantic bags of chips
comes to mind. |
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And I want Sweetums asking me if I want the milk in a
bag. That'd be surreally cool. |
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One way to solve this problem would be to ensure that everything that's sold in the shop is checkoutable using only one hand. |
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The idea doesn't address the motivation of the puppeteers, wouldn't we need equally analy motivated muppet puppeteers as well? |
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Forget Animal. The tobacco kiosk attendant should be Crazy Harry, the pyromaniac. |
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