h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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The monkeys are given a keyboard attached to a word
processor that only
activates the next letter necessary to write the
complete works of Shakespeare. So if the word is "rose"
the only letter on the keyboard that would work would
be the R until the monkey hit
it after banging on various
random keys. When it finally
hits the R, it would appear on the overhead screen
facing the zoo visitors
showing the progress of the writing. Then the O would
be activated
etc. When the word rose was typed by the monkey an
attached despenser gives them a monkey
treat and everybody
watching would cheer and clap.
In this way the complete works of Shakespeare could be
typed by monkeys as their progress was followed on a
the large viewing screen above the enclosure.
They'd also probably figure out a way to hit all the keys
faster so as to get their treats faster, perhaps by
sweeping each row of keys with one finger. In this way
monkeys would not only be writing the complete works
of Shakespeare, they'd be getting better at it with
practice.
I think Shakespeare would love it.
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Less of the poop slinging..would it be possible
to have a mechanical Shakespeare taking
dictation from the monkeys? |
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The monkeys would gradually get better at this, in the manner of a
predictive texting algorithm, for example learning that a ‘w’ is much
more likely to be followed by an ‘h’ or an ‘e’ than an ‘x’ or a ‘q’. |
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What would be interesting would be to display Shakespeare's blocks of text for a period of time and have the monkeys copy for reward, then, get them to try and predict the words that come next in new blocks. Did Shakespeare truly have a handle on the essence of what it means to be a monkey? |
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// The monkeys would gradually get better at this // |
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If that's the case, could the same process be applied to journalists ? |
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one of these days, someone will post the "Monkeys writing
completely original literature" |
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There is still some debate over who Shakespeare actually was.
It is therefore possible that he was, in fact, the lucky one of
an infinite number of monkeys. |
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But that will require an infinite number of halfbakers, shirley ? |
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Monkeys could be selectively bred to write Shakespeare : more actual words (then, after a few generations, phrases) typed out = more of a reproduction score. |
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To speed things up a little, they could be combined with another strain bred for pedantry skills. |
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//could the same process be applied to journalists ? //
I'd bet on the monkeys. |
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