h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Let's cut to the chase. I propose a new product - its marmite and butter mixed, jarred and sold via the chilled department in your grocery store.
This product is a winner because it saves time! My experiments have shown that the time taken to prepare breakfast with the marmitebutter is around 10
seconds less.
This also saves your toast! With the separate products, the toast surface is often destroyed by the process of spreading the marmite on - having the two together reduces/eliminates this. Thus, your toasty breakfast is a far better eat.
Three strengths provided for all tastes : mild, medium and forte-marmitebutter.
Why not also try :
Jammy Butter, Buttery Jam
Marmalade Butter, Buttery Marmalade
Lemon Curdy Butter, Buttery Lemon Curd
What is Marmite?
http://www.gty.org/.../marmite.htm#whatis
"Do take care not to get butter or bread crumbs in the Marmite jar. It makes an unappetizing mess for the next person." [my face your, Oct 04 2004]
Other Marmite products
http://www.gty.org/...mite.htm#otherfoods
[sufc, Oct 04 2004]
Gentleman's Relish
http://www.elsenham.com/patum.htm
[my face your, Oct 04 2004]
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Annotation:
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would it be swirls or a kind of putrid brown colour ?
how do you work out the ratio ? I like my toast marmitey, others may be keener on a more buttery comestible |
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[neilp]. I propose that the product would come in three strengths - mild, medium and fortemarmitebutter. This should suit most needs. By mixing jars, the customer can find their own level. |
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take two pots into the kitchen ? not me, I've got three pots of weirdomite. |
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//By mixing jars, the customer can find their own level.//
Ah but this would negate the time saving advantage of premixed marmitebutter. The only way around it is for the marmitebutter manufacturer to produce a huge number of slightly different "shades" of marmitebutter and arrange them like paint cans along the entire back wall of each and every massive out of town supermarket.
Of course, each shade will have to be given a name. Bogswamp. Milky Tea. Dog Egg. And so on. |
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i like it - a wall of marmitebutter in various shades. woowoo... ok, I take back the three jar versions and opt for the dulux brown range of products |
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I find this quote lifted from a link very telling: "Marmite may be stored at room temperature, even after the jar has been opened. Large jars will last months—even years—without any spoilage." |
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It's so nasty, not even mold will go near the stuff... |
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I may have to post a Velveeta-based idea in retribution. |
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Kind of baked, though not commercially. My grandfather has been preparing his own since I was a little lad. |
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perhaps it should be called buttermite |
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marmite may even improve with age. I will *lay* down a couple of jars and report back. |
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of course, every time you dip your butter knife into the marmite, you leave a deposit of butter and so by the time you get to the bottom of the jar, this idea is pretty much baked. |
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to quote "I won a lifetime's supply of marmite in a competition the other week - one jar" |
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joke supplied by tim vine. |
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My addition to this idea is that Marmite butter comes in a long shallow tub, with the Marmite swirled in an Escheresque pattern that starts out with just a thin thread of Marmite in a field of butter. The thread quickly ramifies and branches as it moves across the tub, until at the far side you have only a thin strand of butter in a field of Marmite - the exact mirror image of the near side. Folks could take from the area with the ratio they liked best. A lot would get thrown away, but butter goes rancid anyway - plus more Marmite butter would be sold. |
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"perhaps it should be called buttermite"
or Marter? |
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Link for Jezzie.
Just had a thought. The ultimate best thing about this is that that there will now be no excuse for the heinous crime that is Crumbs In The Marmite/ Jam/ Marmalade/ etc. Croissant, for eliminating a pet peeve. |
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I must fishbone this. The (dark) Art is to get the toast at the required temperature such that the butter melts into the toast. A considered dollop of MyMate with the toast still hot will then suffice.
A pre-apportioned butter/MyMate mix is simply not flexible enough. (IMHO) |
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I prefer marmite / mymate without butter and / or with chunks of cheese. |
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I prefer marmite locked inside some sort of vault buried beneath the ground where no-one can get at it................ever. |
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//perhaps it should be called buttermite// or "I can't believe it's not buttermite". |
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How are you going to package my Dad's weird lime marmalade/Marmite concoction (as previously recorded on this site)? The lime chunks won't squeeze out of a tube. |
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I like this idea, but why not take it to its logical extreme and mix both marmite and butter in with the bread? No spreading required. :-) |
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Texture, dear boy, texture. You need that layer of grease on the top. |
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No, I think he's got a point. Think garlic bread - crusty, hot and oh so flavoursome. Or even, to add to the labour-saving effect: |
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Sainsburys (who I didn't work for at the time) used to make penut butter with marmite in. It was fantastic. Clearly, you can get the same effect by spreading the M on your toast first and then your SKippy. Try it - it's fantastic. A savoury mouthful if there ever was one. |
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Pop-tarting became legal in NZ this week. |
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Q. How do you heat up a Pop Tart?
A. Tell her that you are a Premier League Footballer |
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excellent idea; always a + for marmite ideas.
Anchor butter combines the best though in my experience, and
BTW have you noticed that all Beer production by-product foodstuffs are not only delicious but nearly always british in origin e.g - maltesers, marmite, twiglets, malt vinegar etc. Perhaps we should restyle our national identity as the bottom feeders of a giant vat of beer |
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Aside: I tried a new spread this morning that might appeal to Marmite fans (because it's also ultra-salty). It's called "Gentlemen's Relish" (not kidding) and consists mainly of anchovies. It's not for the faint hearted for sure, but I've found it goes down very well on toast for breakfast. It appears to be a little hard to get hold of, but I found it in my local supermarket. It comes in a tiny white tub that looks like it's more likely to contain thread or buttons or something. Well, apart from the picture of a fish on the front. Good luck finding it, as I doubt you'll work up the courage to ask a shelf-stacker for it by name. |
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what was old man's relish? (hope it wasn't rude) |
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// marmite may even improve with age. I
will *lay* down a couple of jars and report
back // |
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[po] It's been 2 years now. Care to report
back on the taste enhancing of the
marmite in the jars you laid down? |
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Damn you [jon], you beat me to this one by three years. Still think it's a very marketable product. |
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sorry, just had a peek in the shed and the contents are now a grey slurry with a green mould on the top. shall I send you a jar? |
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It spoiled because you opened it [po]. Get a couple of new jars in your shed and report back in 2009. Throw in a bit of that 'Old geezer's relish' just for fun. |
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