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Lobe Lobbers

 ”Fashionable ear adornments that are fun too!” – The Daily Farmer
 
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Not an ordinary pair of earrings, this distinctive jewelry will make you the life of the party, the prize of the pub. Consisting of a resilient ball and long chain, each swinging earring comes in shining silver or glistening gold. Within minutes you’ll have the bouncing baubles pendulating and whacking each other right under your chin.

Add the chain extensions, move your head up and down even faster (think excited ape), and you’ll soon have the ping-pong-like Lobe Lobbers rebounding above your head also. Then try whipping the head swiftly forward and backward, and your earswings will start caroming and clicking horizontally. Why not choose an advanced model with percussion activation of LEDs, bells and whistles?

Those not into facial jewelry, will enjoy our rubber ball on an elastic cord that fastens to the forehead with an adhesive patch. Show off your soccer skills, keeping the ball ricocheting off your skull, but don’t forget to wear the enclosed Black-Eyes-Be-Gone safety goggles.

—FarmerJohn, Oct 17 2003

drawing here http://www.geocitie...nie/lobelobber.html
[FarmerJohn, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Clackers http://www.bigredto...clackersindex.shtml
Wonderfully dangerous toy from the 1970's [oneoffdave, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       I'm envisioning facial bruises for amateur lobbers.   

       <your mother> "You're going to poke your eye out with those things! </ym>
—Cedar Park, Oct 17 2003
   

       (+) for the use of the word 'pendulating'.
—neilp, Oct 17 2003
   

       Do these come as nipple tassles too? Then I could get a set of each and be the belle of the ball.
—squeak, Oct 17 2003
   

       Yep, they come with the balls from jingle bells. So with the knockers on your knockers, you'll be the belle of the ball with the balls of the bells.
—FarmerJohn, Oct 17 2003
   

       Hodehoho.   

       I think I'd better lie quietly in a dark room for a while before attempting to use these though. And after, probably.
—squeak, Oct 17 2003
   

       Clackers for the head - fantastic +
—oneoffdave, Oct 17 2003
   

       Ah, another school playground classic. +
—DrBob, Oct 17 2003
   

       The man in your drawing has no safety goggles. +
—k_sra, Oct 17 2003
   

       plus the added bonus of hypnotizing your listeners...
—aquamarine, Oct 17 2003
   

       How grand! Once you've mastered the Lobe Lobbers, you could try them as Hip Humpers, eventually working the two sets simultaneously from synchronized to alternating rhythms, then back again.   

       The Lobe lobbers might also be used to surprise would be attackers.
—Tiger Lily, Oct 18 2003
   
      
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