Lipo-Buttons

When liposuction goes wrong it leaves a series of puckered dimples around the midriff area, that cause great consternation to their unfortunate recipients. The solution to this problem has always been known and evident in the many examples of traditional sofas and chairs, which are adorned with round studs to gather and provide structure to the surrounding material.

Lipo-buttons serve a similar decorative function for the lipo-gone-wrong victim, so that they can better emulate the luxurious furniture they now resemble. Buttons are held in place with a simple lace that loops through a ring piercing in the centre of the dimple, and come in a variety of colours, sizes and textures. Ones with long tassels facilitate and encourage spectacular displays when the belly area is exposed during episodes of vigorous dancing.

The advertising photograph to launch the range will consist of a line of unabashed models proudly flaunting Lipo-Buttons, their dimpled midriffs sprayed red, then polished to a gentle gloss, in imitation of a row of empty leather seats at the House of Lords.