h a l f b a k e r yNot the Happy Cuddle Club.
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You know these places where people pay upwards of 50 dollars to take power naps in nice reclining noise canceling chairs? This place will be just like that, but instead of chairs, you will rest your head in the lap of one of our trained professionals at your choosing, the rest of you sprawled out on
some really amazing piece of furniture and you can get massages, too, but it costs more.
Reminds me of this.
http://www.gizmag.com/go/4148/
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Jan 21 2009]
Reminds ME of this...
http://en.wikipedia...iki/Lapland,_Sweden
It's Lapland. For real. [Cedar Park, Jan 26 2009]
[link]
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Suppose you need trained personnel to avoid the the boner problem.... |
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Hmmm.. with the right kind of professional, a lap-nap can lead to other things. ;) |
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+...only if they run their fingers through my hair! |
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Scalp massages are included with the lap fee. But you can give them tips. |
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Lap-sleeping clubs may already exist, I have a feeling? The world is far too otherworldly. |
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I SO miss having fingers run through my hair.
Scalp rubs just ain't the same. |
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For an additional fee, the employee would sing the lullaby of the client's choice, and/or say "poor sweet baby" over and over ... |
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The great part about a place like that, [UB], is you don't even have to know why you're having the time of your life. You just are. |
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This requires of the patron a level of blind trust not ordinarily found in the sleep-deprived urban disgruntled, trust that the apparently accreditied trained professional that forms the surround to the days hired lap will not ever once look upon the exposed neck, visibly slowing pulsethump, bobbling laryngeal bump and find it to be a smooth white canvas on which the professional can display the massed ranks of their petty frustrations, by means of scalpel or hairy bare hands. |
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[calum], with all due sympathy for your frustrations, your metaphors don't quite marry; that violence which you imagine visiting on an exposed white neck might temporarily relieve your frustrations in their massed ranks, but it wouldn't really *display* them, would it? You might need a Hieronymus Bosch-like panoramic painting to do that. |
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Look, I was only trying to help - put down that scalpel, there's a good chap... |
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They sleep almost 35% of the time in Lapland. [link] |
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I thought from the title this would be a lap-dancing
themed theme park |
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I though it was a place where there would be
nothing but cats and dogs drinking water. |
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