Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Kitten Licker

A tongue condom for grooming your kitten
  (+7, -1)
(+7, -1)
  [vote for,
against]

Firstly, let me point out that I don't own a cat and wouldn't use this even if I did.

However, it occurs to me that a young kitten may miss being groomed by its mother, so the new adopted mother could pop the Kitten Licker over the lips (and possibly also nose with some ducting to enable breathing) and groom away. The tongue cover would be rough like a cat's tongue. The deluxe model would also purr.

Disclaimer: Other uses strictly at your own risk.

marklar, Nov 04 2012

These things are, essentially Baked http://www.pet-dog-...=shop-flypage-32714
...except they are, quite understandably in the circumstances, designed for your hands rather than your tongue. [DrCurry, Nov 04 2012]

Tootsie Pop Licking Machine http://www.tootsie.com/gal_machine.php
As mentioned in an annotation [Vernon, Nov 05 2012]

[link]






       Gross, sick and perverted. [-]
8th of 7, Nov 04 2012
  

       Mildly humorous as I find this (more so for the reaction of my arch-nemesis), I am compelled to point out that kittens begin grooming themselves at a very early age, and petting, stroking, and scratching by an attentive owner is an excellent surrogate for momma cat's lovin'.
Alterother, Nov 04 2012
  

       Frisco would not let me come within 10 feet of him with this apparatus on. His nether regions are his nether regions, never to be touched by fake human licks. Yuck. But a + for the thought of something making up for the lack of a mother's love. Your heart was in the right place, I think...just your methodology I take issue with.
blissmiss, Nov 04 2012
  

       Cut the thumb off a cat mitt.
DrCurry, Nov 04 2012
  

       This operation could be performed more easily on a lathe, shirley?
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 04 2012
  

       [8th of 7] The contents of your [] contradict your comment.   

       [Alterother] I didn't mean as a teaching device.   

       [blissmiss] I honestly didn't think of genitalia, I was thinking of behind the ears, the place they have to wipe with their paws.   

       The thing that made me chuckle when I thought of this idea and my reason for posting it, is that I'm 99% sure that if I made this, people would buy it, and they are the kind of people I don't mind taking money from.   

       Also, it should have whiskers.
marklar, Nov 04 2012
  

       Neither did I. Kitten have learned how to clean themselves by the time they're weaned, so as long as you give one plenty of love and affection, it won't miss its mother at all. It really doesn't have enough brains to imprint on more than one caregiver at that age.   

       And you're absolutely right about that sort of person.
Alterother, Nov 05 2012
  

       I bet some people would buy this. [+] for novelty.
phundug, Nov 05 2012
  

       Cat cleaning should instead require copious quantities of carbon tetrachloride and safety matches. Bun withheld pending review by Dr. Katvorkian at the GROGco Testing Laboratory and Carburetor Cleaning Emporium. [ ]
Grogster, Nov 05 2012
  

       Let me tell you a good way to clean rescued kittens (which often have upper respiratory disease where I'm from, and need to actually be cleaned.)   

       Yes, a warm rag works, but if we are talking about an automatic replacement, I have seen some nice dogs do a great job cleaning up the little sicklings. The diseases are usually non communicable, and even the ones that are are only threatening to young ones.
fishboner, Nov 05 2012
  

       Wait, are we are still talking about actual kittens on this idea for a textured, vibrating tongue-condom / oral dam combo for licking pussies?   

       //Yes, a warm rag works, but if we are talking about an automatic replacement, I have seen some nice dogs do a great job cleaning up the little sicklings. The diseases are usually non communicable, and even the ones that are are only threatening to young ones// in bed.   

       Well, _someone_ had to go there!
spidermother, Nov 05 2012
  

       fortunately, just prior to reading your anno, I managed to get sprayed in the face with lemon air-freshener.
FlyingToaster, Nov 05 2012
  

       I thought this would be a machine, perhaps somewhat related to the linked machine.
Vernon, Nov 05 2012
  

       [spidermother]=GENIUS   

       With this exciting new possibility brought to light, I must bun. [+] (I still wouldn't use it on a cat. To recap: Pussy=YES, Cat=NO)
Grogster, Nov 05 2012
  
      
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