Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
The phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.

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Kick Skirt

 Put it on the seat behind you
  (+8, -6)
(+8, -6) 		  [vote for,
against]

Or, as a considerate parent, buy it and put it on the seat in front of your little devil.

A buffer made of shock absorbing material that can clasped on to the back of an airplane seat

—theircompetitor, Mar 16 2005

Knee Defender http://www.gadgetdu...s/kneedefender.html
[theircompetitor, Aug 25 2014]

[link]






       I'll have one for my car, one for my missus' car, and one just to whack [crash] if he doesn't TURN THAT BLOODY GAMEBOY DOWN!!!
—wagster, Mar 16 2005
   

       Just turn around and say in a distinct voice: would you please stop kicking my seat? It annoys me.   

       It really works. Look 'm straight in the eyes mate.
—zeno, Mar 16 2005
   

       Cattle prods. They're the only effective solution.
—lostdog, Mar 16 2005
   

       Or, "If you don't stop kicking my seat NOW, I'm going to pull this plane over and give you a good whack."
—Machiavelli, Mar 16 2005
   

       //Look 'm straight in the eyes mate.//   

       Meanwhile...
—scubadooper, Mar 16 2005
   

       boi, this idea sure got kicked down after an initial 4+. Bum(p)mer
—theircompetitor, Mar 17 2005
   

       This would soften sharp kicks, but the steady pushes would still get through.
—Worldgineer, Mar 17 2005
   

       I'm with [zeno] on this one, only do it with one of those scarily broad smiles on your face at the time - lot's of teeth. Make it look as though you *might* eat them.
—zen_tom, Mar 17 2005
   

       I think that speaking without looking facilitates my staying alive.
—wagster, Mar 17 2005
   

       Just tilt your seat back real fast when they're eating.
—FarmerJohn, Mar 17 2005
   

       We traveled w/ twin 4 yr old boys last December. We did all we could for our fellow travelers: Leap pads with headphones, colouring books, look at how the wing works, listen to the engine, etc.
I still wish they had a soundproof section for children.
"Um, Sweet, Beautiful, Lovely, Wife. I think I forgot my sanity back in the forward cabin right next to the stewardess' drink making section. If I could just step out for a minute to see if I could find it, please?"
—Zimmy, Apr 30 2005
   

       I envisioned some sort of kung fu cheerleader, and man was my croissant ready. How disappointing.
—bungston, Apr 30 2005
   

       //Just turn around and say in a distinct voice: would you please stop kicking my seat? It annoys me.//
Is a pirate voice distinct enough, or should I try the baby talk voice instead?
—brodie, May 02 2005
   

       Use skirt to bind and gag kicker. Place kicker in overhead luggage for remainder of trip. Nap.
—popbottle, Aug 27 2014
   

       iron kick dome?
—pashute, Aug 28 2014
   
      
[annotate]
   


 

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