h a l f b a k e r yThe phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.
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Apply the principles of jazz to a lavish feast.
Five expert chefs, a huge inventry of ingredients, and five courses. The chefs cook the meal infront of the audience/diners. Each chef is in-charge of a course, but the others help him out with it. There is a central theme set by the first chef, which
is then taken up and developed by each successive chef.
It may help if traditional courses are done away with in favour of a series of small dishes (or large bowls which people dip into and share), like Tapas.
The evening could be enhanced still further by the addition of a Jazz band that is sychronised with the cooking action.
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I've seen a UK television programme that kind of did this. I can't remember the name of it, but involved 'celebrity chefs' Nick Nairn, that Irish guy with the beard and ponytail, and some other fool. One did a starter, one a main course and the other a dessert. |
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And I dispute the idea of Jazz enhancing anything. |
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I might just go for this if it could be presented by the guy from the Fast Show: |
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"Hi, and welcome to Jazz Kitchen. Nice." |
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Excuse me, <swigs>Jinbish's beer</swigs> obviously you've not heard any real Jazz |
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I just started listening to some jazz, (which is not to say I have abandoned my alternative/metal/punk roots) but its great to work to (certainly beats sepultura which tends to disturb the secretaries a little). I have also just had lunch. This is how this idea came about. |
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Oh no. Let's not do the musical argument thing. It's as pointless as sitting around saying "I like this food, I can't believe you like that food" etc. |
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Uh oh. Food is involved here as well. OK, here goes: |
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I like fish, folk-rock, steaks, curry, jungle, trance, green tea, nu-metal and sprouts. Who's with me? |
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Bird Lives! Oh no, wait. No, no he doesn't. Bird's got his ankles tied together and an onion up his ass. |
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Questions, questions: Will the celebrity chefs have to be introduced to the delights of heroin first? And what tyoe of jazz are we talking here? Trad jazz, free jazz, fusion, bop or (of course) maxi jazz? Will the patrons have to click their fingers in appreciation? |
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Tw: Oi! Less of the beer thievery! Don't make me angry. you won't like me when I'm angry. |
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Point taken though, my memory is a bit short these days. I have two experiences of Jazz.
1: Sitting in a beer garden in Bristol, listening to some local skiffle band attempt a tune.
2: Relaxing in a bar in New Orleans with *real* musicians. |
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I concede that '2' was enjoyable. |
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The fact that cooks are not quite as specialised as musicians might raise some problems, along the lines of: |
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Jazz player #1: "I'll do the sax solo"
Jazz player #2: "You did it last week!"
JP1: "No, I was on drums, remember"
JP2: "No, Michel Roux was on drums"
JP1: "Look, I don't know how to tell you this, but your riffs are too flat"
[Sound of kitchen knives/ saxophones being drawn]
etc. |
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I think some of you are missing the essential point, which is the solos in Jazz numbers are improvisational. It's not who plays the sax solo this week, its fact that the sax solo is DIFFERENT every time it is played. (Sometimes COMPLETELY different!) That's key to understanding and appreciating jazz (and this idea). |
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There could be some danger with one-upmanship between the chefs though. There would be 'starting course creep' as each evening the starting chef made a more and more lavish opener both to out do the night before and to make the theme more difficult for the following maincourse and dessert chefs.
Sushi on a bed of oyster puree laced with caviar, cooked slowly in champagne and bees. That's gotta give the fella in charge of the coffee and mints a headache. The chefs would have to be good friends who all wanted to make the evening work, for this to be feasible. |
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What is the food equivalent of the drum solo I wonder? Watching beef roast?
I nominate Humphrey Littleton for the Sunday lunch (stodgy and comforting) and Pat Metheny for the stir fried lampreys and lychees in a boisenberry coulis ("interesting" but ultimately inedible) |
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So [krelnik], I take it you own no jazz records? Cos they'd be the same every time. |
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[Gen Washington] Hehe... in fact I own a bunch. And there are a few favorite songs that I have 6 or 7 different recordings of and I like all of them. One nice thing about jazz is live recordings are often better than the studio version of the same song, for improvisational reasons. |
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It occurred to me that some of the better items here on the bakery are like "jazz inventing". Someone comes up with an idea, and the bakers "riff" on it in the annotations, which then spawns other ideas. |
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"Can't read jazz
Got to play it" |
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