h a l f b a k e r yNaturally, seismology provides the answer.
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This kitchen knife has a reservoir of butter in the handle. When picked up it transfers body heat to the butter, melting some of it. This butter is pushed up through the blade where it's extruded through a capillary system, thus lubricating the knife for easier cutting and flavoring the food.
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To be honest anything in the kitchen that does not either (a) contain, or (b) extrude, butter, is kind of useless. |
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The problem with the jar of Marmite* is that some consider it A Gift From The Angels, and some look upon it as a chemical weapon, with no middle ground. |
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Thus opinion is irreconcilably divided, and a source of endless strife and conflict; think of it as the Dome of the Rock, but in a spreadable form. |
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Inevitably we find this extremely amusing. Humans are very odd. |
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*"Marmite" is the french word for a cooking pot or cauldron; thus "a jar of Marmite" is actually a "container of container" and nonsensical. This is of course typical of the french, who delight in making things difficult and overcomplicated, particularly with their so-called "language" with its bizarre lack of a neuter gender. Then they have the termerity to misappropriate the name of an English food product and apply it to a cooking utensil. |
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Marmite is a godly nectar. |
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Don't say that; it raises the ghastly possibility that you might have some sort of a redeeming feature, which is impossible in a deterministic Universe. |
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I'm one of those strange creatures that likes both Marmite
AND Vegemite.
However, while I find Marmite is acceptable on it's own on a
sandwich (but better with cheese); Vegemite is pretty meh
alone and definitely needs cheese (or salt-n-vinegar chips). |
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Yes, but everyone knows you're just plain weird, so that's hardly relevant. |
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I'll take that as a compliment.
Regarding the idea; there are already re-fillable "food
tubes". Adding a knife-like tip for spreading (whatever the
filling) would be a good thing. |
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