h a l f b a k e r yMagical moments of mediocrity.
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The rest of the party is increasingly bacchic, but you have been buttonholed by an earnest, dull - and quite probably amorous - fellow partygoer possessed of positively Ancient Marine tenacity.
Bite down on your fake tooth Halitosis Capsule, thus releasing a noxic cloud reminiscent of cess and
rotting flesh. Your suitor/ suitrix will blench, make their excuses, and move on - never to return. Love will die. A quick trip to the convenience, a quick gargle with mouthwash, and back to Bacchus.
Suspiciously similar
http://www.halfbake...a/Exploding_20Teeth
but this whimsickle character's got a lot more croissants than I did <pout>. [General Washington, Sep 26 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]
(?) Smell as a weapon
http://www.theage.c...06/FFX7QCXEROC.html
U.S. Military is baking a weaponized form of this. [krelnik, Oct 18 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]
[link]
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An excuse is probably easier, as in "Romy & Michelle's High
School Reunion": "Sorrry, I cut my foot before I came in
and my shoe's filling up with blood". |
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For the really tenacious, in addition to the mouth and shoe capsules, maybe also one for the underarm and one for between the cheeks. |
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I think we need these fumes to be actually *green.* |
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[Who's going to post that idea, then? Sobranie cigarettorators, gaffs with colored guffs?] |
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He's 28 in 2 weeks, bliss, and not online right now. I jammed the HB into the spokes of his careerwheels by forwarding him highlights, heh heh. I feel like the anthrax mailer. He'll be hooked any day... |
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Sounds a bit like Duke Leto's poison gas tooth in "Dune" ..... |
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What's wrong with a can of pepper spray ? |
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<tries to add "blench" to vocabulary but can't because she doesn't know what it means> |
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"Blench" is like "blanch", but "cess" means luck (Irish) or rate. |
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[GW]
Apologies, but then - as well you know - plagiarism wasn't my idea... |
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[8th]
Pepper spray? I'm not sure I want to go to any of your parties. |
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[bliss]
<blushes and looks at shoes> Thank you for your kind words </blushes and looks at shoes>. |
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<wonders why someone would scald themselves upon contact with a capsule halitosis user but realizes there are better uses for her time than to wonder about things like this> |
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= "recoil in horror" (which is what you would do if you were covered in boiling water) |
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What's wrong with the old "Burp and Fart" technique? Usually works, and it's free.... |
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thcgenius: You're from West Virginia, up in the hills, am I right ? Figures. |
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[FarmerJohn] So does that mean a cess-pit is a pool of luck or does that derivation stem from cess(~tax)? |
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[whimsickle]...So what do you do if you have halitosis anyway and some excitingly beautiful individual steps towards you?....Howsabout the fake tooth love-scented sweetie? |
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8th: I didn't say it was *my* technique. We do it Detroit style over here. |
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jumblebox: Neither, derives from cesspool:
"Perhaps alteration (influenced by pool1), of obsolete cesperalle, drainpipe from Middle English suspiral, vent, from Old French sospirail, breathing hole, from souspirer, to breathe, from Latin susprre, to sigh." |
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