h a l f b a k e r yCrust or bust.
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Blind people have dogs that see for them. Drug enforcement heavies have sniffing dogs that find stashes of drugs which the heavy could not detect on their own. Why should hedonists miss out?
Gourmet dog is trained from puppyhood to discern between 500 different varieties of fine Continental and English
cheeses, salamis, patés, and other fine delicacies. Gourmet dog can distinguish a superior wine merchant from a merely second rate one merely by sniffing the doorstep. Gourmet dog will lead you through back streets of your town that you never knew existed, leading you to an exquisitly non-hipster German bakery just as they are preparing a batch of fine rye bread. Gourmet dog can even give chase to delivery vans if they contain unexpectedly fine wares.
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So is this like a super hero character or a real thing? |
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Dogs would enjoy this. Presumably they get a suitable reward ? Obviously, not chocolate, or anything else that might be dangerous, but // cheeses, salamis, patés // would be OK. |
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My father's Brittany Spaniel had a thing for eating
the horse turds that the neighbouring Amish animals
would leave in his driveway, and then wanting to lick
you... |
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I'm guessing this is how he acquired a taste for
McDonald's burgers. |
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Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's
reference... |
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By the way, I'm not being sarcastic, I'm still laughing
at that one. |
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It won't work. If the dog is intelligent enough to
differentiate between fine cheeses and indicate to you their
opinion, then they're intelligent enough to lie about the
result and say that the food is sub-standard in the hope that
you'll then discard it in their food bowl. |
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I dunno. They seem like too easy a target. Needs to
be a bit more loved/hated/controversial or more
specific, like Big Macs or Impossible Whoppers or
White Castle sliders. |
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Actually the better followup line could be 'Yes, I know it's
gross, but my dog actually does like quarter pounders..."
Makes it less vague and a bit more punchy. |
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//My father's Brittany Spaniel had a thing for eating the horse turds that the neighbouring Amish animals would leave in his driveway, and then wanting to lick you... I'm guessing this is how he acquired a taste for McDonald's burgers. Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's reference...// |
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Now THAT is actually a stand up comedian quality joke. That would work in a crowd. I think you should offer it to a standup comedian to try out and have them send you a video of the audience reaction, I think it would get laughs. The "Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's reference." is an excellent punchline. |
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Be a cool thing to have on your resume. Is there a place on line where comedians get material? Can you sell jokes? It's a business after all. Gotta be some place where they go to get help with their routines.
doctorremulac3, Dec 16 2020
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"I sniff only the finest butts in town, thank you". |
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With such commendable skills Gourmet Dog will likely give up regular
dog food, demanding instead to eat at your table. Probably on the
table itself. |
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