Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Gourmet dog

 Trained with the most refined tastes
  (+12, -1)(+12, -1)
(+12, -1) 		  [vote for,
against]

Blind people have dogs that see for them. Drug enforcement heavies have sniffing dogs that find stashes of drugs which the heavy could not detect on their own. Why should hedonists miss out?

Gourmet dog is trained from puppyhood to discern between 500 different varieties of fine Continental and English cheeses, salamis, patés, and other fine delicacies. Gourmet dog can distinguish a superior wine merchant from a merely second rate one merely by sniffing the doorstep. Gourmet dog will lead you through back streets of your town that you never knew existed, leading you to an exquisitly non-hipster German bakery just as they are preparing a batch of fine rye bread. Gourmet dog can even give chase to delivery vans if they contain unexpectedly fine wares.

—pocmloc, Dec 15 2020

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       So is this like a super hero character or a real thing?   

       Either way. [+]
—doctorremulac3, Dec 15 2020
   

       Real
—pocmloc, Dec 15 2020
   

       [+]   

       Dogs would enjoy this. Presumably they get a suitable reward ? Obviously, not chocolate, or anything else that might be dangerous, but // cheeses, salamis, patés // would be OK.
—8th of 7, Dec 15 2020
   

       My father's Brittany Spaniel had a thing for eating the horse turds that the neighbouring Amish animals would leave in his driveway, and then wanting to lick you...   

       I'm guessing this is how he acquired a taste for McDonald's burgers.   

       Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's reference...
—RayfordSteele, Dec 15 2020
   

       So, not a Korean recipe?
—pertinax, Dec 15 2020
   

       By the way, I'm not being sarcastic, I'm still laughing at that one.
—doctorremulac3, Dec 16 2020
   

       It won't work. If the dog is intelligent enough to differentiate between fine cheeses and indicate to you their opinion, then they're intelligent enough to lie about the result and say that the food is sub-standard in the hope that you'll then discard it in their food bowl.
—hippo, Dec 16 2020
   

       I dunno. They seem like too easy a target. Needs to be a bit more loved/hated/controversial or more specific, like Big Macs or Impossible Whoppers or White Castle sliders.   

       Actually the better followup line could be 'Yes, I know it's gross, but my dog actually does like quarter pounders..." Makes it less vague and a bit more punchy.
—RayfordSteele, Dec 16 2020
   

       //My father's Brittany Spaniel had a thing for eating the horse turds that the neighbouring Amish animals would leave in his driveway, and then wanting to lick you... I'm guessing this is how he acquired a taste for McDonald's burgers. Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's reference...//   

       Now THAT is actually a stand up comedian quality joke. That would work in a crowd. I think you should offer it to a standup comedian to try out and have them send you a video of the audience reaction, I think it would get laughs. The "Sorry to gross you out with that McDonald's reference." is an excellent punchline.   

       Be a cool thing to have on your resume. Is there a place on line where comedians get material? Can you sell jokes? It's a business after all. Gotta be some place where they go to get help with their routines.
— doctorremulac3, Dec 16 2020 [delete]
—pocmloc, Dec 16 2020
   

       "I sniff only the finest butts in town, thank you".
—blissmiss, Dec 17 2020
   

       + Quite a cheesy idea
—xandram, Dec 17 2020
   

       With such commendable skills Gourmet Dog will likely give up regular dog food, demanding instead to eat at your table. Probably on the table itself.
—whatrock, Dec 17 2020
   


 

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