Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Gorilla Proxy

for students resigned to their fates
 
(+4, -4)
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All of us half bakers have been students at some point. Many of us probably still are. At some point, you have most probably had to do tests and exams for which you did not prepare. There was little chance of passing, let along doing 'ok'. It is these specific situations that I am trying to address.

Introducing Gorilla Proxy. A rental service that trains gorillas to use a rubber stamp. When hired, your very own Proxy Gorilla will go to your test location, taking a rubber stamp with your name on it, and stamp your exam. What the heck, it also carries a pen, just in case it feels like jotting down some of its intelligent musings. Those part marks sure do come in handy.

[upon special request, GP will reassign its agents in order to provide this service to entire classes]

samosa_pirate, Nov 14 2008

Pretty women are walking with gorillas down my street http://www.youtube....watch?v=9Md-t6G-8QA
UnaBubba has been listening to too much Joe Jackson? [jutta, Nov 14 2008]

[link]






       this really doesn't make any sense. anyone can write their name (mostly), so how does this help one pass the test??
xandram, Nov 14 2008
  

       well the point is that its a gorilla writing a test, but i dunno...this was not a very intelligent musing of mine, i am actually giving it the first fish bone.
samosa_pirate, Nov 14 2008
  

       //A rental service that trains gorillas to use a rubber stamp// It's going to need more training than that. It'll have to read an A-Z, get on a bus, buy a ticket, know where to get off, find the exam hall, find your seat, THEN get out the rubber stamp.
Mony a Mickle, Nov 14 2008
  

       //will go to your test location, taking a rubber stamp with your name on it// perhaps they could vote at elections in your name as well.
po, Nov 14 2008
  

       What does the gorilla keep the rubber stamp in?   

       How do you prevent it from going by the bank and stamping your name on a check made out to bearer for the amount of 100,000 bananas?
snoyes, Nov 14 2008
  

       I wanna scream 'Baked!' and post pictures of my co-workers.
lurch, Nov 14 2008
  

       //What does the gorilla keep the rubber stamp in? // I really really wish you hadn't asked that.
po, Nov 14 2008
  

       I think you should train it to use a #2 pencil.   

       Then it could fill out your name on scantron tests, and mark "B" going all the way down. You'll normally get a bit over 25% that way, what with t/f questions, and statistical details.   

       Hey, partial credit is nice, right?   

       Upper division classes will still work with rubber stamps, but scribbling should be mandatory.
ye_river_xiv, Nov 17 2008
  

       //This idea is a lot better than it looks// - or, as Mark Twain said of Wagner, "Wagner's music is better than it sounds".
hippo, Nov 17 2008
  
      
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