Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Giant Eyeball Balloon

iris in the sky
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The Chinese have sent one of their spy balloons across America. We can only presume it's hoovering up whatever data they're interested in acquiring, but they missed a trick here.

Instead of a bland white blob, the balloon should have contained a light projection system, enabling it to appear as if it was a giant blinking, slightly blood-shot eye.

When over some sensitive military base, the iris would expand and contract, increasing the apprehension of those staring up at it via their telescopes. "Why's it doing that?"

Periodically the balloon eye would also "blink" to encourage even more fearful speculation.

The "answer" to this dastardly intrusion is of course a "hedgehog" anti- balloon balloon, which as the name implies, is an equally large blob, but covered with sharp spines. Let aerial combat begin! Poke that eye!

xenzag, Feb 04 2023

https://www.bbc.co....-us-canada-64524105 they burst the balloon...... now there's a race to pick up all the fortune cookies [xenzag, Feb 04 2023]

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       My guess is that it is transmitting data about its location over North America rather than spying.   

       For whatever reason, I keep going to the sleazy side for comments. It's not like me. Yay.   

       xen, (if I may be so bold as to drop the "zag"), I'm a huge fan of the Giant Eye in the Sky blinky eye eyedia, however, word of mouth via social media will remove the surprise element in a nanosecond. Soon it will be replaced with clouds as a point of interest again, God forbid.   

       So I have a little tweak to your glorious idea. Sharpies, a set of Sharpies. Draw on each side a beautiful open and closed eye, that slowly, and sensually, with the wind current as its main source of energy, open and close.   

       Different colored eyes would be the selling point and keep the crowds mesmerized looking up at the sky, waiting to see the color the wind showed you that day.   

       Then it would slowly winky at you, xen, with the big brown sexy bedroom eye. This would keep the excitement going, and the SURPRISE element non-stop.   

       I'm afraid yours is a little too tame.
blissmiss, Feb 04 2023
  

       I see your flying Eyeball, and I raise you a Top Hat...or the Race Car, the Shoe, the Wheelbarrow, the Dog, and of course, the Moneybag. You know, as long as we're playing a giant, multi-national world-sized real-life game of Monopoly, we can offer choices for the players.
Sgt Teacup, Feb 04 2023
  

       Yes. But each country must do it once a month on their assigned day. Too many balloons might be an invitation for a hawk to fly by and pop our balloon. And you know what will happen then, right?
blissmiss, Feb 04 2023
  
      
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