Funkin' Throw Nuts

Far from just a clap trap debacle formed around a suit- inviting adolescent parody phrase, this is instead yet another quickly realizable and elegant scheme to overthrow the entire world, by yours truely, JesusHChrist.

Implementation based on whether or not Trump leaves office.

Funkin Throw Nuts are molded peanut-shell-sized plastic oloid throwing objects with a whistle and clicker inside that are designed carefully so that throwing the object makes a whistle and a clicking sound. These will quickly become popular because of their cheapness, funny name, publicity from the suit that Dunkin Donuts will inevitably bring against the company, their amazing usefullness in catching people's attention, and the nut's ability to surprise unsuspecting teachers.

Funkin Throw Nuts will be the pet rock of 2017.

Funkin Throw Nuts will be produced by Funkin Adaptive Technology which will also make adaptive drones, gravity bombs, bouncy flower generators, and the like.

The Throw Nuts whistle making capability will be developed through an iterative process of trial and error, 3D printing improvements in a never ending cycle eventually creating a complex sonic environment so that the nuts can resonate will other environmental sounds to create a world wide sound that uses the earth's atmosphere as a resonating drum. This rhythmic system will sound like the funkiest possible groove at the ground level, in fact it will be impossibly funky because all of the sounds in the world will be in resonance and that will open a door to other universes so we will have possible shit and impossible shit happening at the same time. It will be a grand funkathon and everyone will have to get used to saying, "funk" and liking it.