Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Not so much a thought experiment as a single neuron misfire.

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Flick Your Hovis at a Pest

Make the punishment fit the crime
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In some parts of the world you can still be stoned to death for certain crimes, but being a pest is not one of them (I hope).

So how to get rid of pests in such a judgemental society? Why simply crumble up any handy bread and flick it at them. They should soon get the message. Plus any waste from the process is quickly cleared up by local birds/children/marmosets (dependant on location).

Use stale bread for the slightly more persistent pest.

(Please note: In this idea the word ‘pest’ is used to represent an undesired person in your vicinity, not pigeons, as obviously flicking bread at them is counterproductive in removing birds.)

eight_nine_tortoise, Mar 31 2009

I had to google that one http://www.hovisbakery.co.uk/
[normzone, Mar 31 2009]

This would have more of an effect http://www.lithicca...zcloviscasthand.jpg
A Clovis point [normzone, Mar 31 2009]

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       Nought fook'd ab'ot wh'it (as they say in Yorkshire).
eight_nine_tortoise, Mar 31 2009
  
      
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