h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Nowadays I've found it's a good idea to wear leather
gloves, pick up firewood, then smack it back down, pick
it up again and *then* take it into the house. This is
necessary to dislodge unwanted hitchhikers that include
wolf spiders, black widow spiders, termites, etc.
Although it's tempting
to douse the wood with bugspray
I'm told this is a Very Bad Idea.
Instead let's "automate" this process by locating the
wood on a platform that could be made to jiggle the pile,
thus mechanically shocking the unwanted critters away.
Firewood is *heavy* so a gearmotor driven cam that lifts
one end of the platform the pile's sitting on would be
ideal. Round and round goes the cam; easy up,
thwacking down. a dozen cycles or so should do the trick;
easy peasy. No more spider bites!
Aug 25, '07 Addendum: I've ordered the steel; will build
one soon!
March 09, '09: Made it into a teeter-totter; no motor
required. Have been using it for over a year; it works!!
Shooting Bananas
http://www.555desig...llpaper/wall017.jpg
From 555 Design [roleohibachi, Feb 04 2006]
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Annotation:
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On next week's show: Thag finds a burnt, still warm piece of mammoth meat dropped near the cave fire the previous evening...and it tastes good! Thag becomes the celebrity chef of all the clans of western Europe. |
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they gas bananas don't they? |
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[po] You mean they're not already dead?
Do they stun them first? |
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Isn't it shoot bananas, gas horses? |
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shooting bananas is very messy indeed. |
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Yes,it's very hard finding the trigger. |
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Bow down to the brilliant individual that can construct the woodpile that remains standing despite this. |
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[elhigh] Oh, you just nail the firewood together. |
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I dunno. Last time I had to worry about bringing firewood inside for the fire, it was kinda satisfying to see the bugs burning up along with the wood. |
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Designing the way to keep the firewood on the shaker would probably be difficult on its own. The gear-operated shaker mechanism should be far easier. |
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Y'uns don't have a oil drum outdoors for a test burn of your faggots? |
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Hehe, I forget faggot means something ENTIRELY different in the UK :o). |
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Why not just spray it down with a non-toxic insect repellent? That way it will burn easier, and you won't have to risk breathing in toxic fumes. |
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Re: non toxic insect repellant: been there, done that. Don't EVER use that stuff on wasps; all it does is piss them off. I got nailed the day after I used the "green" stuff; got maybe 20 stings before I could get away. Never again! |
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Steamboat, insect repellant is for pissing off insects, not for killing them. Never spray insect repellant of any kind at a wasp nest. Use poison for that. |
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Re: wasps. Go see your local friendly linesman (electrical line repairman) - they will have some real funky gear called "wasp-kill" or similar. Linesmen get to see the worst from wasps, on a daily basis, and have armed themselves accordingly. Comes in a jumbo can size with a funny nozzle. Evidently it's pretty gooey stuff, 'cause the stream will hold together for a good 10m (~33 feet to you backwards folk). Instant death to all winged critters, and by that I mean they don't get to leave the nest, just down. Anyone from australia can attest to the aggressive nature of paper wasps - imagine running into softball sized nests, several times each day. |
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I imagine it's basically scortched earth policy ecology wise, I can't imagine stuff that potent isn't a nightmare for the ecosystem, but gawd damn does it sort the little buggers out. |
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The wasp freeze stuff kills them relatively instantly. Many of them don't even have time to drop off the nest. Nasty-great stuff. As far as the thwacker, it might just piss them off so they are nice and bitey. |
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I've never spotted wasps in my woodpile. We'll set the "on" switch 5 meters away and inside the garage just in case though. |
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At the risk of being pragmatic and realistic for a moment, can
I humbly suggest that you could solve the problems of wolf
spiders, black widow spiders, termites, etc. by simply
storing your firewood in England? I can attest to the efficacy
of this simple solution. |
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//...storing your firewood in England?// |
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Yes, [MB], but England is rife with it's own little nasties. Exempli gratia; The English. |
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realistically (ha) what about a sonic bomb of some sort: while "I am a thirty second bomb" probably won't work, there may be frequencies which insects don't like. Toss the contraption onto/into the pile the day before and hopefully by the time you come 'round to pick up some firewood they're all gone. |
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//...storing your firewood in England?// |
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Store it in Wales, then. There's nothing else there. |
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