Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Finish naming months

4 months of the Western calendar have boring names
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(+7, -5)
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Why is it that only 8 months out of the year (January - August) have cool names, while the other 4 are stuck with generic names (September, October, November, December -- i.e. 7th month, 8th month, 9th month, 10th month)? September and its brethren deserve our love too!
deskmutton, Nov 29 2001

Jacobin calendar http://windhorst.org/calendar/
Seasonally descriptive month names (in French). (Ideal for haiku (in French).) [pottedstu, Nov 29 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

I'm confused http://almanakka.helsinki.fi/english.html
nothing new there then.... [po, Nov 29 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Lepidoptera http://www.funet.fi...nglish-index-a.html
These have different names in Helsinki [pottedstu, Nov 30 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Rotterdam System http://pweb.jps.net.../other/rotmonth.htm
How they do it on Mars. [nineteenthly, Jan 04 2012]

[link]






       Good point. Maybe Septemptress, Octos, Novestella, and Decambria, or not.
bristolz, Nov 29 2001
  

       Change the name for January to UB?
reensure, Nov 29 2001
  

       I think we should, if anything, change the months to names considered extremely vulgar. After time, these words will lose their shock value and no longer be offensive.

"Hey, kids, it's almost Assfuck! You know what that means, right?"
"Yaaaay! Christmas time!"
AfroAssault, Nov 29 2001
  

       September could be renamed Osamaber
bristolz, Nov 29 2001
  

       Baked: the Jacobin calendar introduced in France after the French Revolution. Each month has an appropriate seasonal characteristic, which avoids naming them after people or religious events.   

       vendémiaire, brumaire, frimaire (autumn); nivôse, pluviôse, ventôse (winter); germinal, floréal, prairial (spring); messidor, thermidor, fructidor (summer).   

       I've posted a link which includes a converter to the Revolutionary calendar, and an explanation of the slightly-decimal structure (which also included 10 day weeks, and all months were 30 days).
pottedstu, Nov 29 2001
  

       PS: That could be kinda confusing, what with the numerically-named months being out of synch. Do we reschedule September to July, and so on, or do we rename February to Zeromber and January to whatever-the-Latin-for-Negative-One-ember-is?
Guy Fox, Nov 29 2001
  

       janet, favourite, murchison, apricot, maybe, tune, duly, orchestra, septum, toby, novella, decadent.
lewisgirl, Nov 29 2001
  

       I originally mis-read the title as "fish naming months." Maybe the number months could be Haddock, Snapper, Mullet, and Scrod.
beauxeault, Nov 29 2001
  

       If we rename all the months, let's make sure the first letters create a 12-letter acronym, such as CROCODILIANS, or FLIMFLAMMING, or KLEPTOMANIAC. This could lead to many new puns and other witticisms that simply are not possible with JFMAMJJASOND.
beauxeault, Nov 29 2001
  

       I was confused to begin with : 'Finish naming months' I thought we had. Then I realised I was being intellectually flawed. Again. What's Scrod? Has anyone ever wondered why a dodgy 80's haircut is named after a smelly fish? Round of applause to AA, that's one of the funniest things I've read in ages!
sven3012, Nov 29 2001
  

       A Scottish year:   

       Hinter: Dismember (old year dying); Damnuary (dead and in hell); Feverary (shivering and sniffling)
Sproing: Marsh (rain and mud); Ariel (flowers and foolishness); Maya (*seems* to be getting warmer)
Shimmer: Jeune (naive, childlike hope); Jeweli (the odd wee gem of a day); Aw-gusts (what the hell happened to Summer?);
Pall: Step-tender (getting muddy again); Ocht-ochre (greenery gone); 'Nuff-umber (brown, brown and more brown... enough already!).
Guy Fox, Nov 29 2001
  

       Why not just undo all the naming constrants and revert to a system of naming based on the apogee(aphelion) / perigee (perihelion) of earth? pg…pgi…pgii…iipa…until we're all blue in the face?   

       There would have to be a similar convention to eliminate eponymous naming of days and weeks also. Maybe weeks could be on a 28 day cycle so we'd not have 4 weekends a month, just two, since the other two would be weekstarts: lunen, luna, exlune, exluna.   

       Weekdays could be changed to what's being served at the Jacobean middle school.
reensure, Nov 29 2001
  

       Now AA, the real test of time would be to see how profanic December is.   

       OldTimer - "Hey kids, I can remember a day in December..."
Kids - "AAAAHHHHH! Grandpa said a bad word!"
OldTimer - "No I didn't! Ah, I forgot, it's assfuck to you, as I was saying..."
barnzenen, Nov 29 2001
  

       To save the phantom punster posting it as an idea, try these:   

       tammikuu, helmikuu, maaliskuu, huhtikuu, toukokuu, kesäkuu, heinäkuu, elokuu, syyskuu, lokakuu, marraskuu, joulukuu.   

       Yep, that's the Finnish naming months. (Jan-Dec.)   

       (Addendum: I think [po] posted a link to a Finnish calendar while I was busy typing them all into the English-Finnish online translater. So, apologies.)
pottedstu, Nov 29 2001
  

       A lot of this was covered in the 8 Month Year idea where I suggested:

"...maybe we can come up with new names, perhaps sell the naming rights to the highest bidders. There could be Coketober, Microsoftember, DECember, Disney, AuGates (you know he'd buy more than one)."

There were also references to the 42nd of AOL-TimeWarnerary and Sony Fool's Day jokes.
sirrobin, Nov 30 2001
  

       'To save the phantom punster posting it as an idea'
I think you'll find that [po] already posted it as a link.
angel, Nov 30 2001
  

       'nuff said what
thumbwax, Nov 30 2001
  

       'nuff said what was that?!
lewisgirl, Nov 30 2001
  

       Lay on, Mac'nuff.
cp, Nov 30 2001
  

       Pihlajakehrääjä, Kastilianpihlajakehrääjä, Pikkupihlajakehrääjä, Valkotäpläkoivukehrääjä, Silkkiperhonen, Tammensyyskehräjä, Euroopanbrahmakehrääjä, Espanjanlyhytsiipikehrääjä, Marokonlyhytsiipikehrääjä, Algerianlyhytsiipikehrääjä, Hallakehrääjä, Etelänhallakehrääjä   

       (Finnish-named moths)
beauxeault, Nov 30 2001
  

       How long did it take you to type that?
sven3012, Nov 30 2001
  

       I bet he just cut'n'pasted the 'hrääjä' bits.
lewisgirl, Nov 30 2001
  

       Would that be the Algerian Greyling or the Algerian Grizzled Skipper Moth?
pottedstu, Nov 30 2001
  

       [beaux] you forgot pikkachukehrääjä
po, Nov 30 2001
  

       Bless you!
PotatoStew, Nov 30 2001
  

       sniff ... thank you .... sniff
po, Nov 30 2001
  

       po, wouldn't that be a Japanese/Finnish moth?   

       sven, lewisgirl, I cut'n'pasted all of them.   

       pottedstu, maybe sven can tell us which it is. I don't know what any of it means, except, of course, for Castillian, European, Spanish, Moroccan, and Algerian. And could that be Ethylene? What does ethylene have to do with moths? And maybe Silk = Silk. And of course, I think we've all deciphered the Finnish word for "moth."
beauxeault, Nov 30 2001
  

       Sorry, they're all lepidoptera to me.
pottedstu, Nov 30 2001
  

       Don't get me wrong, this is rather amusing, but where's the 'n' gone? isn't this all getting a bit letterist? oh, and no, I can't help you with the validity of the Finnish moth names, but it looks counterfeit to me.
sven3012, Dec 03 2001
  

       All your moths are belong to us.....
lewisgirl, Dec 03 2001
  

       I like to think of these generic month names like the spare plinth on Trafalgarc Square. - i e for future expansion / to honour someone not famous at their construction. Perhaps now is the time for the first of them. My vote would go to a scientist or mathematician
Dub, Jan 03 2012
  

       Perhaps it could be like the naming of hurricanes, with the names changed every year, but always in alphabetical order.
mouseposture, Jan 03 2012
  

       Or how about names in numerical order, but in an old language like Latin or something? We could offset the numbers a bit, just to be amusing.
baconbrain, Jan 04 2012
  

       June and July were once called Quintilis and Sextilis. The Rotterdam Month Naming System for Mars is pretty nifty.
nineteenthly, Jan 04 2012
  

       I'd be interested in a binary 4-bit 'gray-code' which would allow for any slowing of the earth's orbit around the sun by providing a 'spare' 4 months.
Jan = 0000
Feb = 0001
Mar = 0011
Apr = 0010
May = 0110
Jun = 0111
Jul = 0101
Aug = 0100
Sep = 1100
Oct = 1101
Nov = 1111
Dec = 1110
WWW = 1010
XXX = 1011
YYY = 1001
ZZZ = 1000
zen_tom, Jan 04 2012
  

       tammikuu, helmikuu, maaliskuu, huhtikuu, toukokuu, kesäkuu, heinäkuu, elokuu, syyskuu, lokakuu, marraskuu, joulukuu.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 07 2012
  

       And, in leap years, sudokuu.
mouseposture, Jan 07 2012
  
      
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