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Fartless Chair

 No more need to politely decline invitations to lunch at Mexican restaurants.
 
(0) 		  [vote for,
against]

OK, so this idea isn't 100% original. But we reach higher by standing on the shoulders of giants, right?

I hate cubicles for a number of reasons, mostly related to their effect on my productivity and they way they stifle expression--including the expression of bodily function. Specifically, farting is frowned upon in my office. But hey, what is it, like 15-20 packets a day per person? I don't have time to get up 15-20 times a day to go for a fart walk.

I propose a "Fartless Chair", which would work much like the smokeless ashtray, except that the ventilation fan would be designed in such a way as to generate enough white noise at the right frequencies to cover up those embarrassingly vocal pipers.

Let me tell you, they sell office chairs for ungodly amounts of money per unit to large companies. The last one I had was almost $1000, and it was just an average model (only 2 levers/knobs/buttons). You guys in?

—jwagon, Nov 11 2003

I mentioned it; suppose I gotta link it. http://www.halfbake...om/idea/Fart_20Sack
[bungston, Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       I think this is designed to detract from my lunch "encore" of farty sounds ... sorry, [jwagon], no dice ... I finally found a woman that can compete with me on the farting front and I'm shooting for quality time here ... but an [+] for the nice idea anyway
—Letsbuildafort, Nov 11 2003
   

       Creative, to package this into the chair instead of into the pants like the million other ideas on this forum and in Japan.   

       I suggest possibly also connecting the chair to the office ventilation system, so that farts could be freely distributed and shared around the office.
—phundug, Nov 12 2003
   

       It is good to share.   

       Can I have one in my car please so my wife doesn't force me to pull over so she can jump out and stop holding her breath before she suffocates?
—dobtabulous, Nov 12 2003
   

       A farting contest isn't over untill somebody shits.
—sufc, Nov 12 2003
   

       You mean I'm not the only one who goes for fart walks?
—jivetalkinrobot, Nov 12 2003
   

       And here I thought you were just coming over to see me.
—RayfordSteele, Nov 12 2003
   

       Why don't you just roll down the window in your cubicle? I mean, like, duh!
—Overpanic, Nov 12 2003
   

       Perhaps the chair could be hooked up the the fart storage bag someone was good enough to devise here recently.
—bungston, Nov 18 2003
   

       Doesn't the smokeless ashtray make a hideous whining noise? Still, a worthy notion.
—ConsultingDetective, Jan 30 2004
   
      
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