h a l f b a k e r yNo, not that kind of baked.
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You're about to set off on a long journey, you have had
experience of "gentlemanly discomfort" before, only this
time you are forewarned and forearmed with a set of bs0-
patent driving pants. These look like nice normal slacks
(other styles to follow) however they have a pair of (very
well guarded)
12-Volt fans in the crotch area for maximum
ventilation. You sit yourself down in the car, plug yourself
into the cigarette lighter, and you are off, the thermostat
takes care of temp regulation, with a booster button to
help shift any lingering "hot air".
[link]
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"Aaaaaaagh! - reversed polarity!" |
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(obligatory) Is that a fan in your pants or are you just happy to see me? |
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"Aaaaaaagh! - reversed polarity!" |
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Hence "very well guarded" I was envisioning a fine, hair-friendly mesh. |
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Oh and a well placed diode would sort out any reverse polarity issues. |
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I picture clampable trouser cuffs with intake ducts that are hooked up when you enter the car. A fan powered by the vehicles engine blows conditioned air (heated or cooled accordingly from the dashboard control) up your pants, causing the legs to ballon out while providing a refreshing warm or cool breeze to the nutcase driving the car. |
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Don't forget to unplug yourself from the cigarette lighter when leaving the car. |
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I'm sure MC Hammer had a pair of these. |
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You wear pants while driving? Why? |
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um, i think this is a good idea. i don't know why. but it's a mutual problem for the ladies as well. |
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Side effects can hurt you. I hear that driving with one of these gadgets hooked up can make you incapable of using the caps key. |
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[po] must have had one for a while. Ahead of the game as usual. |
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I'm sitting out on my front porch just waiting for [Galbinus] to drive by... |
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[nuclear hobo] I already do something similar when i wear a suit in the car. I possition the vents so it blows up the sleeves, I'd certainly appreciate an option to direct air up the ankle area. |
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But where would the farts go? |
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I assume that farts would be forced upward under your clothing, eventually exiting around your collar. |
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Perhaps a one-in one-out fan system with a charcoal filter? Perhaps a gas mask could be retrofitted to the crotch area? |
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The French solution would be perfume. |
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the French solution to everything's perfume... |
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