Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
It might be better to just get another gerbil.

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Fake Guard Dog II

More Bakeable than ever!
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An IP65 weather resistant wifi-connected outdoor smart camera with AI-driven pet detection and configurable software triggers, battery powered so it's super easy, barely an inconvenience to install anywhere on one's property? With a built-in speaker allowing you to project your voice through it? Pull the other one, I hear you about to say.

Well they definitely exist. Ring Video Doorbell, Wyze Outdoor Cam, etc. This idea is for a software package for such cameras that plays the sound of a loudly barking dog through the speaker of such a camera when a pet or wild animal is detected, such a goddamn raccoon raiding a halfbaker's Koi pond.

Use in conjunction with a motion-sensor sprinkler system (also widely available) for a full shock and awe campaign!

21 Quest, Sep 08 2022

[link]






       I don't know how hydrochloric acid ended up in my sprinkler system, officer. I must have hooked up the wrong barrel. I so hope that poor stranger who got lost in my basement is going to be okay.
Voice, Sep 08 2022
  

       A1 that's awesome, but it doesn't appear to be suitable for outdoor use.   

       Oh, and you're fired for that pun.
21 Quest, Sep 08 2022
  

       Ooooh... Very nice. Still, it doesn't employ AI to detect animals specifically so it'll go off every time *I* walk near my pond, which I had hoped to avoid. Not looking to scare myself shitless the first few times I try feeding my fish!
21 Quest, Sep 08 2022
  

       Make it so, Numba One!
21 Quest, Sep 08 2022
  
      
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