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I remember a disgusting idea some time back about censuring or editing-out sections of certain classic works of literary fiction, in order to make them more digestible for those of delicate sensibilities. Well this is kind of the opposite... except with movies.
Instead of removing expletives, ADD
MORE IN! With some high-quality dubbing tech, the possibilities are endless... Just imagine Rhett Butler turning around to Scarlet O'Hara and uttering the immortal words 'Frankly my dear, I couldn't give a cats arse'. Listen, as Mary Poppins admonishes her charges with a string of bad language that'd make a docker blush.
Curb Your Enthusiasm
http://www.hbo.com/...id/cast/essman.html Susie Essman nails her role [thumbwax, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Extra bad.
Extra_20Bad_20Language_20Movies Subsitute piratically colorful expletives and gratuitous cussing for exposition. [bungston, Jul 24 2009]
Wizard People, Dear Reader
http://www.youtube....watch?v=u981JhkK46o Harry Potter, dubbed with mildly profane narration [sninctown, Jul 24 2009]
Beware of the Easter ****** Charlie Brown!
http://www.youtube....watch?v=TH6f_uP-dKo re-dubbed for gratuitous offensiveness [Laughs Last, Aug 01 2009]
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Annotation:
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Ever since I've seen the Bogart Coke commercial, I've been thinking about R-Rating or even NC17ing old movies. Just add the scenes they cut away from. |
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Yeah, but not to Mary Poppins. |
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To judge it, you would first have to see my version of the Wooden Leg Named Smith joke. |
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I'd watch these films, if drunk. I suppose best use would involve shoehorning vulgar language into frightfully proper old films. e.g. "It's awfully easy to lie when you know that you're trusted implicitly. So very easy, and so very degrading. You hump." |
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I know people who could star in these movies for free - they wouldn't be acting either. It's so funny to hear these guys speak, especially when they get animated. I think films based on the premise of gratuitous swearing would soon get boring, although the sex scenes could be interesting. |
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I'm guessing that Quentin Tarantino or Martin Scorsese would be involved with this somehow. |
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//films based on the premise of gratuitous swearing would soon get boring//
Like South Park? |
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This would ruin "The Sound of Music". |
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yeah but Scooby-fuckin-Doo might finally be watchable with this plan. |
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Now with the advent of youtube this idea would be bakeable with ensuant hilarity. I envision Maltese Falcon with dialogue by Terence and Philip. |
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Actually I think The Lorax would be a better film to modify in this fashion. The rhyming verse begs for scatologic improvement. |
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Swearing is a good idea... but please also add fart noises. There is no film that could not be improved with some well-timed farting. |
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It will probably be somewhat of a letdown. I've seen some of the porn movies where you can watch it in "naughty" or "nice" mode, and some of those directors and actressess don't have much imagination when it comes to making it "naughty". |
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// yeah but Scooby-fuckin-Doo might finally be watchable with this plan.// sp: Scrappy-fuckin-Doo. |
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