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Dangle from a branch a tantalizing-but-impenetrable, clear, polycarbonate container full of scrumptious seeds, nuts, and grain.
The type of animals who eat such food and who would normally tear up your roof will stare at it quizzically for a few seconds,
attempt to access its contents without success,
and then out of shame run off to your neighbour's property, leaving your roof
leak free.
Safety lamp
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Safety_lamp Useful [8th of 7, Aug 24 2020]
Critter tearing up roof
https://www.google....mgrc=KaV4ruANSi76KM [pertinax, Aug 26 2020]
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Annotation:
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I can not tell you how much I adore this idea. You can fake
your neighbors into thinking you are a kind soul who loves to
watch the birdies visit the feeder. Hahaha, when you are
really a fruitcake who hates all little living beings. This is
genius I tell ya. |
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// you are really a fruitcake who hates all little living beings. This is genius I tell ya. // |
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It is indeed. We are concerned that we did not think of this ourselves. |
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Glass would be better than polycarbonate. |
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A design like a classic miner's safety lamp <link>, which permits air to flow through but blocks any other access, will get round the scent problem. A small solar-powered fan integrated into the cap will do the job. |
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For extra pointless cruelty, the deluxe version should have an opening transparent lid and a motion sensor, so that it closes tight whenever a "customer" approaches. However, the Post Office clearly have extensive Prior Art in that technology- licensing may be needed. |
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[+] I don't know why I find deliberate and focused efforts
aimed at being sub-useful amusing, but I do. |
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//glass would be better than polycarbonate.// |
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I think the large US market should be considered.
Polycarbonate is likely more bear-resistant than glass. I can't
think of anything worse than the device falling to the ground,
smashing and disgorging the bountiful contents as some kind
of final victory to the gathered animals. |
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" don't know why I find deliberate and focused efforts aimed
at being sub-useful amusing, but I do." ~~~bs0u0155~~~ |
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Without that kind of idea, the bakery would have about 10
entries left. (mostly beanangel's) |
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+ Its halfbaked genius. though i would feel like I
was being mean to the little birdies
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//feel like I was being mean to the little birdies
// |
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Feeding the birds is often at the expense of squirrels
& other critters. At the HB there was an attempt to
make a bird-proof squirrel feeder, but that was
bound to upset one faction or another. The complete
absence of feeding anything is the only way to
remove discrimination. At the same time, you have
still spent time and money demonstrating your
willingness in principle at least, to feed things, and
are therefore a good person. |
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Amen, to phony good people. This encompasses 1/2 of
the American population right now. And no, I ain't
saying which half. In the interest of peace. |
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*desperately tries not to throw in the few words it would take to turn [Bliss]'s comment into a shitstorm the size of Texas |
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Go on, [Voice] ... do it ... you know you want to ... Resistance is Futile ... |
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Obviously whichever half Voice and 8th are unaffiliated
with. |
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//the critters that tear up roofs// |
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Around here, roofs are mostly made of corrugated metal. There
are local critters which can tear them up, but only in unusual
circumstances. In fact, the only example I can show you is of an
artist's reconstruction using a tiled roof - linked. |
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On the other hand, it's quite clear that you have a few kangaroos loose in the top paddock ... |
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All I can say is don't feed the evrything-proof nothings... |
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