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The new Walkie Talkie building in London has been melting cars
parked in a critical spot that is the focal point of a type of city life death
ray. This ray is being create by the curved geometry of the Walkie
Talkie's window array gathering the light of the sun and
concentrating it
in a particular
area.
The solution to this problem is to permanently occupy the
particular affected area or
parking spot with one of Erwin Wurm's most excellent fat car sculptures.
As an alternative, there is also the Glue Society's melted ice
cream
van, but I think this is a bit too obvious and visually loud. (See links)
Erwin Wurm fat car
http://www.lustnati.../artist/erwin-wurm/
one of my favourite artists [xenzag, Sep 04 2013]
Glue Society Melted Ice Cream Truck
http://www.thisisco...y-the-glue-society/
Great fun, but a bit obvious [xenzag, Sep 04 2013]
Melted Car
http://www.bbc.co.u...s/magazine-23944679
courtesy of the hideous Walkie Talkie Building in London [xenzag, Sep 04 2013]
[link]
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Perhaps better to point out to architects of tall buildings that for years they have been missing the chance to use their constructions as solar energy collectors ... |
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Use the parking space for the collector horn of a
radio telescope? |
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The same architect did a similar thing before...the
building was called a "fry scraper". |
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Or at night...the opposite with a laser? |
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I mean look at that bloody building. How much more expensive was it to construct the concave wall, as opposed to a normal, vertical one? Twice as expensive? Three times? |
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What a huge waste of resources. |
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After some internet searching, I think I found the
reason. The owner said that he wanted a building
based on the shape of some kind of fish...they settled
on Balik Salmon. But then they wanted two of the
buildings next to each other. A pair of Balik buildings... |
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solar-power in the summer, homeless shelter in the winter ? |
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Gotta admit it's rather a step forward in urban planning: from "that highrise is wrecking the view" to "it burns ! it burns !" |
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//The problem is how to protect parked cars from being melted// This is the halfbakery, so I proposed a halfbaked solution. Of course there are plenty of sensible solutions. |
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For distribution around the neighbouring streets and premises, large polished stainless steel panels mounted on lightweight frames, to be angled perpendicular to the direction of the hideous building. |
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The solution is just to use car paint which will
withstand temperatures equal to those on the
surface of the sun. Apparently. |
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Erm, it only works when there is sunlight, so basically it's a once a year occurrence, probably soon have it's own festival |
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All the more reason to place one of Erwin's cars there... wrap it up, and unveil it at the appropriate time of the year when the sun begins to heat up that particular spot. |
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//appropriate time of the year// What's the
likelyhood of a ray of sunshine in the end-of-March,
beginning-of-April sort of season? |
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In hell, or London? In hell you might have a shot. London, no chance. |
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Erwin Schrödinger car - don't look, it might be melted
Erwin Chargaff car - he's pretty bitter it came out twisted
like that
Erwin Rommel car - like you're fighting your way out of the
Sahara
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Ever had a moment when you forget where you parked
the car? |
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"I'm sure I left it here! Hang on a moment...what's that
puddle on the floor?" |
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