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My emails are always perfectly spelled and perfectly punctuated. I read them several times before sending and apply semicolons and after-punctuation spaces perfectly correctly, and I fix all typos I notice.
Quite frankly, no one else I know does this and I bet my emails look pretty square. Especially
in a quick back-and-forth conversation where the other person's like "you have to se theawesome vacation photos i gotback1" and I'm like "Really; Please, With Respect To The Photographs, Allow Me To View Them"
There should be an "Informalizer" button which would pop up a input box asking me how many errors I would like to introduce; the computer would then alter - UNBEKNOWNST TO ME - the email in that many different places - and then send it! (most errors should involve commas, spaces, or the word "the")
When the other person replies and quotes my message, I will realize for the first time that I made an unanticipated typo, and it'll be just like when a less careful person makes a typo and doesn't realize it until later.
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I would use this on the emails I receive at work, just to make things interesting. |
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"Maik sure u send that report asa, or u r fired!!1 lolz |
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"The reasonable man adapts himself to the conditions that surround him... The unreasonable man adapts surrounding conditions to himself... All progress depends on the unreasonable man." |
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/"Really; Please, With Respect To The Photographs, Allow Me To View Them"/ |
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<excessive capitalisation-induced shudder> |
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or you could just use a teenager as a scribe |
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THIS COULD ALSO BE UZED FOR PEOPLE WHO PUT THINGS UP FOR ACTION ON EBAY! THE ONZ HOO FOUND AN ITME BUT DOENT NOW ANY DETAILS COS THEY ARENOT EXPRETS! |
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sp: "an input", but I imagine that was the
Informalizer at work. |
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sp: "which would the pop up a input box", but I imaging that was the Informalizer at wrok. |
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//The unreasonable man adapts surrounding conditions to himself//
I bet GBS never went skydiving. |
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