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We are one body because we all share in one blood. Well that's a fine idea but let's face it, sharing a cup with a bunch of strangers is pretty grim. Have you seen the kind of people they let into churches these days? At least Jesus only had to share with twelve others and by all accounts they had pretty
high standards of cleanliness (mutual feet washing etc.). These days a bit of research might reveal that Holy Communion, despite its divine ordination, is in fact a significant disease vector. Some churches tackle ths problem by dealing out a little toy-sized glass to each parishioner. This fixes the hygeine issue but somewhat detracts from the whole Communion thing and creates loads of washing-up.
This idea solves these problems and also streamlines the whole process. The cup is made from transparent sugar-glass and is entirely edible. It is perforated into bite-size pieces which spiral around the vessel from top to bottom rather like petals on an artichoke. Upon receiving the vessel the worshipper lifts the cup to his lips, imbibes a good swig from the top-most exposed petal, and then bites, the petal shearing neatly off along the fault line. Clearly the cup should also be somewhat bread-flavoured. Amen.
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A commonly-used solution to this problem is to stick with one
large cup, but each person dips their bread or wafer into it
instead of actually putting their lips to it. When you get
around to measuring the disease-vector thing, you could
check to what extent that practice mitigates it. |
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A few groups believe that the alcohol content of the wine
kills many germs present on the chalice. If so, seriously
ramping up the proof with pure grain alcohol would kill more
germs and certainly add to the religious experience.
Hallelujah! |
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