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I have spent about a month trying to figure out how to do this. I hope I have it correct.
My name is Eddie, I was the husband of the angel your site recognized as Dr. Fowler. I have needed to do this for some time, and I have continued to put it off. I read her diary today, and realized that she
made some great friends on this site. It would not be fair for me to withhold this information from you, as she so enjoyed your company.
Dr.Fowler (Renee), my wife of one month was killed in a tragic car accident on Dec. 29th, 2002. She was upstate with a friend that was being shown a house on the 28th. She had asked Renee to come along to get her out of the city for the day. That evening on their way back they were struck by a drunk driver. Renee's friend was killed instantly, and Renee passed the next evening. She was 27 years old.
I remember many times the first thing she would do when she got home was check her "halfbakery" ideas. Some nights she even stayed up hours reading and debating.
Unfortunately, you guys did not get the chance to know the real Renee. She was my best friend. I loved her with all my heart, she was intelligent, loving, and the most beautiful woman I have ever known...both inside and out. She loved people, and made it her life goal to make a difference in someone's life everyday. I hope that she made a difference in some of your lives. The world has lost something special with her passing. I miss her terribly.
Journal Entry (Oct 2002): "I discovered something new this week. A quirky little thing called the halfbakery. It is a website for "halfbaked" ideas. Though I have to admit many of them are very good ideas and should become fully baked. I had a lot of fun reading some of the ideas and annotations. I have even dared to voice my opinions. Although I have noticed a couple of members like to give the newbies a hard time...I think they will warm up to me in time."
Reneè Fowler idea, from the heart
http://www.halfbake...26_20Groom_20Decoys
[FarmerJohn, Oct 04 2004]
http://www.lapetcem...m/html/p_donot.html
http://www.lapetcem...m/html/p_donot.html
[DrCurry, Oct 04 2004]
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deja vu. Dear Eddie, I can say from complete experience that I understand your grief. My heart aches for you. Please stay with us. ((((((hug)))))) |
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How specially tragic, eddie, that you and she were only so recently married. I can only imagine... you have my deepest sympathy. |
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Thank you for sharing your sorrow with us. As we pay our respects to her memory, we honor you as well, as through you, she found happiness, and with us, she shared that joy of life. Grief knows no bounds, and it touches us all. I humbly ask that you not lose sight of that which she possessed, and more importantly, she shared with us, and that is hope.
Hope springs eternal |
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From Renee to all her friends: (read at her funeral) |
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When I die
give what's left of me away.
To children
and those that wait to die.
And if you need to cry,
cry for your brother
walking the street beside you.
And when you need me,
put your arms
around anyone
and give them
what you need to give me. |
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I want to leave you something,
something better
than words
or sounds. |
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Look for me
in the people I've known
or loved.
And if you cannot give me away,
at least let me live in your eyes
and not in your mind.
You can love me most
by letting
hands touch bodies,
and by letting go
of children that need to be free. |
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Love does not die,
people do.
So, when all that's left of me
is love,
give me away. |
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Thank you for sharing these words, Eddie. My heart goes out to you and to all who knew Reneé. |
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Renee and I shared a few exchanges in public and in private. I was fortunate enough to have her share her nervousness at her coming wedding and her joy after the honeymoon. She was someone I always looked out for as a sincere, warm and original person, and I too had been wondering why she hadn't been heard from. |
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This is very sad news indeed, I will miss her. My heartfelt condolences to you, Eddie, it is indeed a tragedy to have such promise replaced with terrible loss. |
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... and always shall be, in spirit. |
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My deepest sympathies go out to you. |
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I hope you guys don't mind that I let Renee's parents read all the nice things you had to say about her. We all really appreciate your kind words. It is always nice to hear from those that only knew Renee and no one else in the family. It is proof in itself that she always kept it "real". I thought of something I would like to share, she used to dress up as a clown, and called herself Caliope. She would go out and find homeless children and travel to the dangerous projects and slums to visit children. We always thought that would be the way she would go. None of us would go with her, mostly out of fear, I think...probably and unfortunately out of ignorance. We had always tried to talk her out of it, and she would say, "these children deserve to know joy as much as the next...if I can make one of them smile, then I have done my job". |
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To our surprise, when the people that lived in those areas of the city heard the news of her death, they planned a "celebration". I received an invitation to attend and "celebrate the life of Caliope". I did attend, and I really appreciated being able to celebrate her life, a real change from mourning her passing. They had photo albums full of pictures (many in costume, some without). It was obvious that she loved those children, she was willing to risk her life to show them that she cared. When she passed, the biggest tragedy was that she had not left behind someone just like herself. She had never had children. But in seeing these children that she loved so dearly, I realized that she left behind so much of herself. The children would tell me stories about her. I laughed much more than I cried. I cried because my ignorance prevented me from sharing this part of her life with her. But, now I know that there will ALWAYS be some of her left. I now visit her "kids" as often as I can. They all remind me of her in different ways. One little boy in particular, his name is Miguel, carries around The Velveteen Rabbit, given to him by Renee (also her favorite book from childhood). She always said that story reminded her of the importance of friendship. |
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I guess I could go on and on about her. I would participate in your other forums, but I am not as creative or as witty as Renee. I will always check in to see if their is anything that I might be able to "jump in" on. For now I will sign off. |
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(and as Renee would say:) Until next time, remain identified. |
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It's a shame I didn't get to know her this well while she was still around. She seems to have left a trail of good things with everyone she's known. As a bride-to-be, I especially admire your ability to handle this all. I don' t know what I would do if I were in your shoes. Deepest condolences, [eddiedobbs]. |
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I've been reading halfbake for a couple of months. |
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today, I stumble upon this remembrance page. I read, and I cried. |
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For the first time, I created my account, not to post an idea, but to thank everyone who played a part in creating this community. |
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I didn't know Renee, never read her postings, never argued with her ideas. But as I read through this page, I feel like I am getting to know her. I could feel the energy of her life, the radiance of her love, and almost imagine her smile in my mind. |
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Eddie, Renee lives on. In people whom's life she has touched, she lives on. Strangers like me get to know her and be inspired by her life. Thank you for sharing with us, her life is one worthy of all celebration. Nothing can replace her presence, but take heart, and be joyous of the life she has lived. |
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Someone it grieves me not to have met. |
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I, too, wish I had known her better. |
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(for the record, i'm currently serving National Service) |
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*turns up at gravesite dressed in army uniform, blue beret and M-16S1.* |
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*stands at ease at first, then at attention, and presents arms* |
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*returns to attention, makes a right, falls out* |
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Mr. Dobbs,
I may be too young to comprehend what it is to lose a loved one, but nevertheless, I express my condolences. Being unable to add to what has already been said, I offer a verse from Scripture that I hope may bring some comfort: |
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"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." - Psalms 23:4, NIV |
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May you //not lose sight of that which she possessed, and more importantly, she shared with us, and that is hope.// |
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My utmost condolances to Eddie, She truely was the kind of halfbaker that keeps this site together. |
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Eddie, I didn'tknow Renee, but I have read the notes left by others who did, and your descpription of her has left me with tears in my eyes. My own friend died in a drunk driving accident, except he was the driver. He was alone, but he crashed because he was swerving out of the way of another driver on the road and lost control. I onlywish Renee had been the one saved when Dan died. It's tragic to get over, because there's no reason for it to happen. No sickness, and being so young. Dan was 17, and I'm still not over his death. I hope you know that she is not here but her memories and love have been passed on while she was here. Stay strong. |
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is it better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all? |
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Mr. Jam, (the best artiste on the bakery), you leave us all the time, and it hurts, but we are all the better off, In my opinon, for having the pleasure to have gotten to know you at all. |
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I knew her. Actually I found this site by doing a search for her name. I was a teenager when she came to poss homes. That was the projects that I grew up in. I am in college on money that was raised in her memory to send us kids off to school. She would have wanted that. I live in Savannah and I go to Savannah College of Art and Design, my major is historical preservation. I would like to be a part of this group because I think she would encourage me to use my creative side in this way. I hope you don't mind. |
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And we'd all be glad to have you here. |
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that is pretty dang cool, [TB]. |
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tallbrownie. There are pictures of Dr. F. on the halfbakery calender. She was stunning.
I actually IM'ed her frequently, and I still show up as Dr. Fowler when I log on to Yahoo. Somehow we got forever linked. |
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How cool this world works. What a great pleasure to meet cha! |
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It seems odd to me to read all of the things on here about her. It has been a while, but it seems like it was only yesterday. You are right she was gorgeous. My dad use to tease her and ask her if she was an angel. She would blush and say "not hardly". Her inner beauty matched her outer beauty. Did any of you get to meet her? The first time I met her I was sort of rude. She was at Poss Homes and Reggie White was there that day. The two of them were friends but I think it was because they both were involved with helping inner city kids. I wanted to meet Reggie White. I told him I want to be rich and famous and never live in the projects again. He listened to my spill and "assigned" me to Renee. I was so mad and disappointed. She taught me a lot though. She taught me to be proud of myself no matter what. She taught me that the only way out of a bad situation is to always try to make good decisions. I think I have. I think I am going to be ok. I wish I had been nicer to her. I wasn't the nicest kid. |
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Nice enough to say that, though. You might be OK. |
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Thanks for sharing that [tallbrownie]. I never knew [drfowler], I joined the HB too late - but I'm glad she inspired and helped you. it's a pleasure to have you here. |
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Couldn't help but think that maybe drfowler, mightycheese, and no12pass were all there to greet bristolz. That is a nice thought. |
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They may be even setting up a heavenly version of the halfbakery...maybe with angel food cakes instead of rolls, and devil's food being the negative instead of bones. ;) |
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