h a l f b a k e r y"Not baked goods, Professor; baked bads!" -- The Tick
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Quite simply, Donut
Chainmail is chain mail made out of lots and lots of doughnuts.
The sheets of interlocking fried dough rings can then be cut into
rectangles of varying sizes and sold.
Those wishing to feel royal may fashion themselves flowing cloaks
made out of sugar-dusted grease.
If
you want a unique birthday cake, stack rectangles of donut
chainmail, frost the result, and stick in some candles.
Hungry ghouls could rattle edible chains.
Gangsters wanting to save money can buy a whole new kind
of
bling, saving on both food and shinies.
Knights can wear vests of fried mail armor to repel churro-swords
and kruller daggers.
Scale mail examples
http://www.iserv.net/~scottc/items.html
Look at the bracers [Aristotle, Oct 10 2009]
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Annotation:
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This idea desperately needs to indicate how such material is meant to be made. |
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Interlocking rings have to be cut, interlocked and then joined, (unless they are hewn from a big solid block). |
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How do you propose to join the cut ends of doughnuts? |
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Also there is a natural limit on toroidal thickness against centre hole diameter for mail; I have never ever seen a doughnut with sufficient thinness relative to its outside diameter. |
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[ ] while eagerly awaiting more info. |
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To join the ends, just interweave the *uncooked* dough into
mail, rejoin the ends of the *uncooked* dough rings, and
when you're done,
drop the entire resulting 6-ft square into the fryer. |
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To account for toroidal thickness in mail, ...make donuts
with larger holes. |
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Um, dougnuts actually use a batter, not a dough. As such it can't be weaved (to soft). This might be doable with bagels, or it might be possible to put the batter in a thin metal mold and fry the entire mold. |
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I'm sure this is possible with modern technology, batter or
dough. Bagel chains are a good idea too. |
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Hah! Feed The World with edible Christmas decorations. They look good, and on Jan 7th (adjust for local variations) can be taken to the local food bank (adjust for local variations). |
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// dougnuts actually use a batter, not a dough. // Then why aren't they called batternuts? I've made them with dough. |
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Okay, let me say commercial ones are made with batter. As
for the other, why do you park on a driveway and drive on a
parkway? (in the US anyway) |
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I should also point out that mail is usually made with rings about 7 or 8mm diameter, and I have never seen a doughnut that small. If you use larger rings then the mail becomes very tricky to handle and loses a lot of its slinky allure. |
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I think batternuts sounds like an expletive. |
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//Slinky allure is probably a dersibale feature// I believe you, truly I do! |
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How about pretzel chainmail? |
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To even vaguely look like chain mail, this will be called cheerio mail. I've made chain mail and would think gluing or pressing the rings together to be challenging. Also I think it would break up if fried in sheets, [MechE] has the right idea: //it might be possible to put the batter in a thin metal mold and fry the entire mold// |
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I think sliced bread was better. |
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But what I don't understand, is, how exactly do they link? You talk about chains and rectangles...and it doesn't seem like one donut would fit in a hole of another, unless they were fried that way...dough pre-fitted together.
A mold WOULD work, good thinking. |
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For now I think I'll just go to Krispy Kreme and watch them crank out their donuts on an assembly line. |
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A mould would not work - how would you mould them linked, and then remove the mould? |
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A multipart, multiaxis mold. It can be done, it just wouldn't be easy or cheap to use. |
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The doughnuts would also need to be thin in
comparison to their diameter to make anything like
conventional chain mail. They wouldn't be like the
doughnuts we know and love. |
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Scale mail might be a better prospect, with fried,
sugared slabs of dough overlapping each on an edible
background (reinforced rice paper?). |
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A weave of divine tasty treats, the scent of which,
will melt the heart and mind of any angry attacker to
craving compliance. |
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