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Somewhat unhopeful of being
chosen for eternal salvation, I would like
a
device that would warn me of the
Rapture
in progress. If nothing else, I would be
able to slack off work, knowing that
nothing would really matter anymore.
My
idea is to implant an altimeter and
transceiver
in the Reverend James
Dobson
of the Family Values Institute. I believe
Dobson would be agreeable, as he thinks
he will be one of the first chosen during
the Great Event. As he is taken aloft, the
altimeter would broadcast his ascension
to
anyone who subscribes to, say, a
"Rapturecast." We'd have to build-in
something to filter out his commercial jet
flights, etc., but I'd feel a lot better
knowing where he is altitudinally during
these Last Days.
Halfbakery (way back): Tie Me To A Christian
http://web.archive....0To_20A_20Christian [jutta, Oct 08 2005]
[link]
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What if he was abducted by aliens, how would your little device know the diffence? I would hate to have a false reading on something as important as this. |
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//What if he was abducted by aliens// Well, obviously there'd be a cut-off switch up his ass, which we all know is the first place they'd probe. |
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Dr. James Dobson is a psychologist, not a Reverend. He has been criticised for preaching without credentials. |
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Is there some quote I can read where Dobson says that "he thinks he will be one of the first chosen"? |
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What "credentials" is one required to have in order to speak about their beliefs and what governing body sets this requirement and is therefore presumably qualified to criticize on that basis? |
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any who don't agree, [half]. It's one of the great ironies of the Christian community. so much division. |
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Wouldn't it just be simpler to put some motion detectors around cemeteries? |
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Dobson is head of Focus on the Family, an organization based in my old hometown of Colorado Springs. I call myself a Christian, but still think he's a nutball. Some people like him though. The organization is really more of a political group than a religious one, meant to spread ultra-conservative Christian political views through a weekly radio show among other media. |
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"Dobson is head of Focus on the Family, an organization based in my old hometown of Colorado Springs . . . [the] organization is really more of a political group than a religious one, meant to spread ultra-conservative Christian political views through a weekly radio show among other media." |
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[rasberry]: Ultra-conservative Christians think furries and D&D players are among the greatest threats to our nation's security? |
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I miss that Tie Me To A Christian idea, with its physical calculations and spiritual schemings. That was a fun one to read. I am not sure how to find stuff with the wayback machine - would someone link that one up? |
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