h a l f b a k e r yVeni, vidi, teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini.
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Ladies! Gents! Do you like diamonds? Want a diamond ring? How about 82,726 of them?? That's how many 3 mm synthetic diamond rings are used to make the ring mail in the new Diamond Ring Mail Suit, from BUNGCO!
The Diamond ring mail suit is impenetrable to knives, spears, arrows, and maybe bullets!
If you fall off your motorcycle and skid along the highway, you will have no worries in your diamond ring mail pants. Diamond is light - even lighter than glass - and the Diamond Ring Mail Suit weighs only "slightly" more than the same suit would, made of wool! Diamond conducts heat, so even if you wear your Ring Mail under your ordinary clothes, you will be cool, cool, cool.
And speaking of cool, nothing is cooler than when the lights hit that suit and each one of those tiny rings gives you its all! Order soon, quantities are limited!
[link]
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Dear BUNGCO,
Thank you so much for your repeat shipment of the Diamond Ring Mail biker clothing, after the other one was stolen.
I had an unfortunate incident recently, when an auto driver was temporarily hypnotised. I came off the bike and skidded down the road. Please see attached invoices for road surface repairs and skin graft.
Your limitation of liability neglected to mention that the heat from friction with the road surface was conducted perfectly to my skin.
Yours, |
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If you fall off your motorcycle and skid along the roadway I bet a significant number of the rings would just shatter. Diamond is hard, not tough, you know. |
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Also, how do you make interlocking links of diamond? |
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No matter. This would be totally frickin' awesome just to look at. |
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"You've got mail, diamond ring mail, from a guy."
"No thanks, I'm otherwise engaged." |
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I'm holding out for Fulerene plate mail. |
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Wouldn't other motorists be dazzled by the ring mail? |
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[+] For the image it creates in my head... |
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/road surface repairs / - heh! |
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You'd get a lot of girls... |
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You want to send diamond rings through the mail? I don't get it. Maybe you meant 'maille' which would be a much better idea. Be a pain to fabricate, though. |
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mail: n. Flexible armor composed of small overlapping metal rings, loops of chain, or scales.
[Middle English, from Old French maile, from Latin macula, blemish, mesh.] |
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maille: n. A small piece of money; especially, an English silver half-penny of the time of Henry V. [Written also maile]
[French maille, Old French. also maaille, LL. medalia.] |
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/maille: n. A small piece of money/ Maybe this should have been an idea for the new dollar coin. |
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Male: A chest beating, hairy, insensitive, moody, beer swigging, farting, foot smelling, blob on the couch. (Or atleast some of them.) |
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I resent that.
I have never in my life swigged beer. |
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That is why you are one of the exceptions, and a diamond in the rough. |
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Meh. Most people who make maille(including me) spell it as 'maille' although there disagreement over this. |
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e-maille: electronic money? |
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émail is French for "enamel" |
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