Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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Devonshire Vending Machine

 It's not hard to see where this one came from.
  (+2)
(+2) 		  [vote for,
against]

Gerald stumbled out of the computer lab, into the grey light of the evening. He rubbed his dry, bloodshot eyes and thought about food. Glancing at his watch, he realised that the cafe would be closed - he would have to make do with whatever the vending machines yielded.

Not much, it seemed. Sugary fatty salty crap; or sugar-free fat-free taste-free nutrition-free crap. But here was something new - a discreet machine, almost anachronistic. The price was a bit steep, but Gerald was in no state to haggle with any more machinery.

A few minutes of soothing music, and his food was ready. Two warmed scones with jam and freshly whipped cream, accompanied by just-brewed tea. Gerald strode back to the lab, reconstituted for what work remained.

—Detly, Apr 29 2004

"Oven quality food up to 8 times faster!" http://www.geapplia.../advantium/home.htm
[half, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Bacon Roll Machine` http://www.halfbake...on_20Roll_20Machine
Another UK regional vending desire. [waugsqueke, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]


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Annotation:







       + scone   

       I think instead of music, it should have a reassuring granny voice:   

       "ello deary. Now, you aren't cold in that sweater are you now, deary? Why don't you put on a nice warm coat? So cold these days, and I get such a pain down me left side 'n all when rains like this...."
—not_only_but_also, Apr 30 2004
   

       As long as someone comes along and puts fresh scones in every day (every 2nd day at least) it could work. And no microwave, them things is nasty on food
—hatch, Apr 30 2004
   

       oh pleeeese! some of us are trying to watch our weight <drool>
—po, Apr 30 2004
   

       'Ere, ere, BrauBeaton. Whipped cream indeed.
—egbert, Apr 30 2004
   

       Really? I didn't know it was clotted cream.   

       No microwaves - they make the pastry soggy. I was thinking along the lines of those - excuse me - halfbaked bread rolls that you can get, that can be cooked in a few minutes in a small oven.   

       And your choice of tea or coffee.
—Detly, Apr 30 2004
   

       [detly] thaaaat be a reet gertlush ideal. Noe mistake, nor noethin.
—jonthegeologist, Apr 30 2004
   

       Devon is also renowned for its custard...
—MikeOliver, Apr 30 2004
   

       Must be a UK thing.
—yabba do yabba dabba, Apr 30 2004
   

       Wow, thanks, [AO] - you've now compelled me to further my calorie-collecting hobby. [+]
—Letsbuildafort, Apr 30 2004
   

       Thanks for that, [half] - should cut the time down nicely.   

       (I'm not UK regional, nor am I across any pond (what pond?).)
—Detly, May 01 2004
   

       the atlantic pond!
—po, May 01 2004
   

       Couldn't be further from the Atlantic if I tried. :P The Indian Duckpond is between myself and Devonshire, and the Pacific separates me from those crazy Peruvians.
—Detly, May 01 2004
   

       so I gathered!
—po, May 01 2004
   

       Ooooh, I was ready to invent this a few hours ago.
—Detly, May 14 2005
   


 

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