Demoncracy

Democracy has it's flaws but it's the de rigeur political system these days due to the freedom and equality it promises. In reality the power is in the hands of the rich select and the unintelligent (and easily manipulated) masses. This is working OK but there is room for improvement. I propose that, on this eve of hallows we outsource all of our world governments to Hell. Each country would be run by a high ranking demon, each of which would in turn have to report back to the great defiler himself. This would grant the following benefits:

Free spikes for all. No more religious conflict. Standardised world tax rate at one soul per person per life. A ghoul on every corner and two firepits in every drive. Fear induced work ethic. Convenient "disposal" of dissidents and the unemployed. People can be openly evil without fear of prejudice.

And best of all, Starbucks can stop pretending to be a coffee retailer.