Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Conversation Captioning

"No, I can't hear you at all. Please, continue."
  (+4, -2)
(+4, -2)
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Have you ever been in a noisy room and been unable to hear the person sitting right next to you? What if you could READ what they were saying? This system would use a device that resembled a cell-phone headset. Instead of a microphone, however, a tiny camera would be aimed at the wearer's mouth so that it could optically interpret the movement of the lips as words. The headset would then send a signal to a lapel on the wearer's shirt. The lapel would feature a little scrolling LCD screen, which would display the wearer's words as text. No more yelling, no more exaggerated enunciation.
whippinggas, Apr 08 2005

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       If everyone was reading each other the room wouldn't be noisy.
benfrost, Apr 08 2005
  

       wht ws tht u sd, bg T?
po, Apr 08 2005
  

       Sign language is really useful for this. A couple of friends of mine are fluent in sign language, they can communicate drinks orders or chat across a noisy, crowded bar with effortless efficiency. Also good for saying rude stuff about people who are standing in front of you!
Jim'll Break It, Apr 08 2005
  

       There is no way in a world of cheese that this would work. [+]
MaxwellBuchanan, May 18 2007
  

       [+], especially if it makes at least as many mistakes as current real-time captioning for televised news programs.
nuclear hobo, May 18 2007
  
      
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