h a l f b a k e r yStrap *this* to the back of your cat.
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I can't help but feel there's part of the story missing. |
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what does the can have to do with mercury? What
does opening the can have to do with mercury? what
does tissue have to do with opening a can? Why is
Private Pyle out of his bunk after lights-out? Why is
Private Pyle holding that weapon? Why aren't you
stomping Private Pyle's guts out? |
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Tuna comes in easy-open bags, now, you know. |
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Not sure I understand, is the idea to prevent the _can_ from getting mercury on it, the _fish_ from getting mercury in it, or you hands from getting covered in mercury-infused fish? Because I have never (as far as I know) encountered any of those problems... |
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"ah yeah, ah yeah, ah, ah, ah. Ah yeah, ah yeah, ah, ah, ahhhhhhhh"... |
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[21], what have you started...? |
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Does that song also have a catchy tuna? |
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It is unwise to eat large amounts of tuna with iffy sources. |
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//iffy sources// or sauces, for that matter. |
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This idea is an unorganized grabastic piece of amphibian
shit. |
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Now that I edited and linked everything together, can
we get on with an inventive sort of discussion? I didn't
expect the Spanish inquisition! |
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You don't want to touch it with your hands, but you want to eat it??...or you mean the can? Don't get tuna packed in oil, get the one packed in water. |
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title:
Clean tuna can opener |
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subtitle:
for opening tuna cans without getting your hands
dirty |
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idea:
<leave this field empty> |
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Just eat steak. Last time I knew steak was mercury free, unless its a road killed cow |
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Per at least one study, steak apparently runs about 5ppb depending on where in the cow it came from. Canned light tuna (as opposed to white) has about 57ppb. |
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So, no it's not mercury free. (Eggs run about 30ppb). |
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What I'm trying to figure out is what keeping the packing oil (which does not significantly affect mercury concentration) off your hands has to do with mercury. It's not like the mercury comes from the can either. |
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mercury scavenging nanobots? |
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I'd settle for a mechanism that keeps the packing liquid from shooting into my crotch when I squeeze the can. |
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I still don't know what the post is about though. |
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There's some confusion about the type of can, I think. Around here, tuna comes in short cans that are otherwise bog-standard. It takes a can opener to get them open. |
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Some aluminum cat-food cans around here have a pull-tab scored top, that requires no can opener or any tool, but I've not seen human-food tuna in one. Maybe "mercury-free" tuna come in such a can, where [pashute] shops, and thermometer-grade tuna in a can-opener can. |
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Opening a flimsy pull-top can would be messy, indeed, as the can collapsed under the grip needed to pull the top off. |
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But, aside from the confusion about all that, the idea, as edited, still contains the phrase "Not sure how to make it, though." Which means it isn't an idea, but a wish. |
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I'd halfbake what I think is the problem by holding the can down with a suction cup underneath the can. Since the idea has nothing like that, I should fishbone. I dunno why I'm not ... pity, maybe? [ ] |
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A machine that holds the top, bottom, and sides of a
standard tuna can with electromagnets. It then uses
a metal punch to punch through the top and bottom
of the can. The metal bits are discarded and the tuna
is allowed to fall into a bowl where it is mechanically
pressed to separate solid from liquid. The liquid is
discarded.
Then a little squirty thing deposits the desired
amount of mercury from "just a touch" to "mad
hatter" |
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the sides of the can are scored vertically, then it's put into a press. The sides split, squishing the tuna juice out. The can can then be opened normally. |
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Or get a P38: you can then put the can on the table and open it without tilting. |
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Or open it, angled away from you, above the sink or cat. |
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//P38// Walther or Lockheed? |
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Boil the can to remove the label and glue. Then finely
grind the entire can and its contents. Finally use an
extremely powerful magnet plus a bit of agitation to
pick out the bits of metal. The remaining tuna can be
pressed mechanically and repacked into a new can. |
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I think we just hit on the problem: He's been eating the cans. So really what were looking for is a tin opener that will significantly reduce the about of can that you have to eat with your tuna. |
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"Spent my money, took my car, started telling her friends she's gonna be a star" (Oh, and link to a means to address the issue in the idea). |
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Writing with tears in my eyes (due to laughter but
nothing to do with mercury) so sorry if I'm not clear
again. |
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Voice got it right. The mention of mercury was only a
futile attempt to remind my fellow americans
(defined by their crave for tuna) to limit their eating
of it. |
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The idea gives two possible outlines to possible
implementations. |
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Xandram's link shows a tuna press and strainer. But
then you have to clean THAT. |
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So here's a more refined outline of my proposal
merging mine with my daughter's. |
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A large nutcracker type of clutch pliers with two
handles, catches the can on its sides. A spirit level on
one of the handles helps you keep the can at level
and squeezing it lightly actually frees the top. A third
lever from above with a magnet covered with a
disposable tissue tip, lets you squeeze the oil out,
and then remove the lid. |
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Alternatively for cans with a self-opening tip, the
third handle has a small claw that can grasp it, and
assist with pulling the lid open, and then pushing it to
squeeze the oil out, and finally to remove the lid. |
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If this simple opener would be in widespread use, the
tuna would be shipped with the peaces of
napkin/tissue so that you never need to wash this
thing. |
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Its an idea not a wish, because I gave a half baked
outline (actually two) for the solution. And the tuna
in the can was cooked. |
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Yes we do. Back in the 80's when Israel had mostly
local tuna fish, definitely NOT the "chunk light" when
american people came for a visit, they would bring
with them suitcases with tuna. And it wasn't for sale
or profit. It was for PERSONAL USE. |
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When groups came and were served the Israeli tuna,
after being told that americans like tuna (and peanut
butter - to the same affect) they would look at it and
not touch it. The organizers and hotels all knew of
this, and organized importing large amounts of "US"
tuna fish for them. |
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Then the save dolphins campaign started and Israel
started receiving tons of unwanted extremely low
cost Starkist cans. Then Israel went dolphin friendly,
and Starkist became (or at least printed on their
cans) "dolphin friendly" too. |
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So your right: Other countries now like tuna too. But
Israelis for example are not dependent on it, as they
are on cucumbers and chicken, as opposed to most
Americans that can hardly imagine themselves
without tuna (and ham). |
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Are you sure it wasn't just that the American tourists were bringing tuna as a last resort to eat in case they couldn't find anything locally that they could stomach? Tuna may not have been the first choice of food, but it is packs easily. I wouldn't be surprised to find that there was a popular travel book about Israel or a tour company handout that recommended bringing food just in case with tuna as an example. |
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I think [scad] has it, there. I've packed tuna and crackers for travel food, my own self. |
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My trick for opening tuna cans is to wipe/wash the top clean, then place the can carefully flat, use the can opener to pierce the lid in two places opposite each other, flip the can over almost all the way, and pour the oil out one hole while the other lets air in. Then wipe off the drips, flip the can back to flat, open the lid the rest of the way, and drop the lid in, flip the can nearly over, use the lid to to squish the oil out, tilting just right, and put the can back flat and somehow get the lid out. |
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Actually, I now just hold the can flat while using one of those can openers that cut outside the rim, lift the top off, add condiments, and eat the tuna and oil with a spoon, maybe stirring it up to daub onto crackers. |
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I gave up on removing the oil when I realized I was replacing it with mayonnaise, which is mostly oil. It's a lot easier, cheaper and less messy overall to just eat it. |
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Then I gave up on canned tuna after eating fresh tuna. Then I gave up on all tuna after seeing a vid of them hunting---they are beautifully streamlined predators. |
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[pashute], thanks for the clarification regarding mercury. |
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so you don't eat tuna and do eat bacon? |
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OK, after brain's description of the process, for those
of us who use Humus rather than mayonnaise and for
those who feed the cat dish with the oil here's
another dab: |
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You drop the tuna can on its side into a vertical slot,
which has a small "shelf" in it, so the tuna can is now
caught in the middle. You then press the electric
button. Said tuna can is then pressed on both sides
causing lid to be removed and oil to pour out,
without touching any parts. |
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Pressing a second electric button releases the grip on
the can, still held on the "shelf" and lightly pushes
the cover down, causing it to drop into the garbage
can. |
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Finally, a third press releases the "shelf", the can
with the tuna tumbles down and by the shape of the
"opener" is forced to land with the open side
underneath. The tuna is pushed out of the can by
gravity and following the abrupt stop, into your
plate. |
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You can then pick the upside down can from the
sides, without touching any oil. |
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... so, is tuna packed in water instead of oil not sold where you people live? |
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water packed tuna still makes a mess and still needs
to be well drained for the sake of flavour. |
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Clearly what's needed
here is
a combination
high speed can-
opener /
mercury-extraction
centerfuge. Surely
the Israelis have a
spare centerfuge
laying around
someplace. Maybe
even conveniently
located inside a
'canning factory.' |
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According to our newspapers the tuna sold in Israel
doesn't have the mercury problem that the US tuna
has,
because the reports in the states were about a
certain
type of tuna only. So no centrifuges are needed. |
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Is it true that the reports were
restricted to a certain type of tuna, or is it for tuna
fished anywhere in the world? |
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I can't use the centrifuge I have in my basement to
check out Ford's idea, because it may be needed in
an emergency for cleaning orange juice from nucular
fallout. |
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But seriously, lets please stay on the tuna opener
topic. This is an issue that may be realized, if
accomplished, as the turning point of the 21'st
century. |
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