h a l f b a k e r yLeft for Bread
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Service personnel who perform acts of gallantry are awarded decorations.
Civilians who perform acts of gallantry, or conspicuous service or humanitaran acts, also sometimes get medals.
Even animals can receive rewards for bravery.
This year, why not recognise someone's contribution in a physical
way?
Now available, get some BorgCo Christmas Decorations.
Each gold-foil covered chocolate medal, in a variety of styles and ribbons, comes in a presentation box, and the purchaser can use the online tools to create an impressive, if worthless, citation.
Why not award your husband the Medal of Outstanding Forbearance, for not contradicting your worthess son-in-law Derek that Chelsea have a good chance in the Cup this year (thus provoking a huge row), despite knowing that they'll never do anything meaningful until they get some decent midfielders.
Surely your wife deserves formal recognition for putting up with your bloody mother for several hours before Christmas lunch, while you fled to the pub to escape the whining boot-faced old harridan ?
Maybe your son has gone way beyond the call of duty in getting up on Christmas morning and going out in the pissing-down sleet to turn your daughter's pony out into the paddock while she slept off a monumental hangover ? OK, he only did it because he wants the car later and she'll have to let him have an extra turn, but the lad did actually do it.
Make your Aunty Vi feel extra special for keeping an eagle eye on Uncle Rob, and making sure he didn't surreptitiously neck half a bottle of your twenty year old single malt, like he did last year ?
Bless 'em all, bless 'em all, the long and the short and the tall...
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Annotation:
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Timeo Danaos et dona ferentes. |
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Then again, it's Christmas, so have this small chocolate croissant
in a presentation box. [+] |
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//Timeo Danaos et dona ferentes// He did? Dona will be sorely missed. |
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extending your idea a little I looked up "3d printed
chocolate certificates" and there aren't any! |
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I think chocolate should be ethically harvested with drones
rather than people. |
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// chocolate should be ethically harvested with drones rather than people. // |
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Well, in some localities, people are already ethically harvested by drones, so there's a precedent. |
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I've worked inside a Harvester before, does that
count? |
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What sort, Massey-Ferguson, International, or New Holland ? |
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// medals being too small // |
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Did we mention that the Medal for Not Giving Your Slut Of A
Sister A Right Slap is the size of a frying pan and weighs eight
kilos, unwrapped ? |
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Any time after your payment clears. We take all major* credit cards, cash, cheque, bullion, bouillon, cut and/or uncut jewels, bearer bonds, recreational drugs meeting or exceeding minimum purity criteria, slaves, weapons and/or ammunition, non-perishable foodstuffs, or anything else really. |
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*Has anyone got a minor credit card ? |
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Er, is your sister, like, seeing anyone at the moment ? |
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International. We had to pull the main rotor out and put a
new one in. That sort of work deserves some kind of
award. |
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We try to avoid giving credit cards to minors. |
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One beef bouillon cube coming right up... |
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// We had to pull the main rotor out and put a new one in. // |
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Particularly if it's done in the middle of a field on a hot day, which is usually the case. |
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// That sort of work deserves some kind of award. // |
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It certainly does, along with fixing the knotter on a straw baler, which is/a right swine of a job. |
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