Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I never imagined it would be edible.

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Chest of Drawers

 A miniature set of drawers that you wear on your chest.
  (+10, -4)
(+10, -4) 		  [vote for,
against]

Problem: Pockets are difficult to see into.

Solution: The Chest-of-Drawers features pocket-size drawers that slide in and out horizontally, so that when you look down, you can see the entire contents of your drawers arrayed before you (see linked illustration). Wear the Chest-of-Drawers over your shirt or underneath. The "Chippendale" model (pictured) looks good over bare skin.

Each drawer is about the size of a Tic-tac box or an Altoid box. A single Chest-of-drawers can have from six to twelve drawers in it, plus a little drop-front desk. Use velvet-lined drawers for jewelry. Drawer dividers let you file your toothpicks by size and color.

For even more cargo room, wear the Chest-of-Drawers together with the Drawers-of-drawers. This straps on like a belly pack, but instead of nylon pockets with zippers, it has little plastic drawers like a tool chest (see tool chest link). Upper surface can be used as a writing desk. The [2fries/mensmax] model can be swiveled around to the back, to be used as an "end table".

[Appendix A]
The back of the chest unit is hinged at intervals, to allow it to conform to the contours of the body. (horizontal hinges between each row of drawers.) So anyone can wear it, to attractively accentuate his/her curves, as it stores his/her stuff.

[Appendix B]
Per [Entymon's] suggestion, the drawers are secured with a notch, as on sailboats. This keeps the drawers from sliding out when the wearer leans over. To slide the drawer out, the wearer lifts then pulls.

—robinism, Mar 01 2005

Non-artist's rendition of "A chest of drawers" http://members.cox..../chestOfDrawers.jpg
[robinism, Mar 01 2005]

Matchbox Drawers http://www.enchante...projects/class3.htm
Not just for matches anymore. [robinism, Mar 01 2005]

Tool Chest http://www.aircraft...hapages/cabinet.php
The Drawers-of-drawers is kind of like this, but less deep. [robinism, Mar 03 2005]

How can a material be rigid, yet drape? http://www.klockare...big/breastplate.gif
By the way the units are attached [robinism, Mar 05 2005]

Figure with drawers http://oniria.iespa...our-part_Screen.jpg
actually, it's her whole right side... [k_sra, Mar 07 2005]

I like this one, too http://www.bananaet...anthropomorphic.jpg
"hold on a minute, I can't find my pants!" [k_sra, Mar 07 2005]

This is the single drawer (w/leg drawers) variety http://everywitchwa...burning_giraffe.jpg
(I love that Dali called it "burning giraffe") [k_sra, Mar 07 2005]

[link]






       //Would that be a prothesis, or wearable furniture?//   

       Not a prosthesis, though that's a good idea too.   

       The whole problem with drawers in clothing is, you need space between the garment and the skin to store the drawers when they're closed. Therefore, the perfect place to position drawers is directly below the breasts, where there is usually an air gap. The drawers, when closed, would extend out from the ribcage exactly as far as the breasts.
—robinism, Mar 01 2005
   

       The "Chest of drawers" could also be worn by men, in which case the top of the chest-of-drawers would be suspended from the shoulders by bra-like straps, and the drawers would extend from the clavicle to the bottom of the ribcage, like a soldior's breastplate, or an accordion. The top drawer would be shallow, so the wearer could see past it to the lower drawers.
—robinism, Mar 01 2005
   

       Do you have a lazy susan/man wearing a barrel variation of this chest of drawers?
—mensmaximus, Mar 01 2005
   

       fabulous artwork! I say because I have to feel good about myself..., love the finial and broken pediment, lovely touch.
—dentworth, Mar 03 2005
   

       Gee, I sure hate compliments, but if it makes you feel good about yourself, go right ahead :-)   

       Broken? That's just my three point perspective orthogonal projection that has you confused. The pediment is perfect (modeled on the AT&T building in NYC).
—robinism, Mar 03 2005
   

       I just found out what a "Broken pediment" is. I didn't know that that little dip in the middle of the pediment had a name.
—robinism, Mar 03 2005
   

       ain't google wonderful
—dentworth, Mar 03 2005
   

       Now if I could just find my matching end table...   

       I very much like your rendition of the idea, [robinism]. Drawn in perspective, too.
—bristolz, Mar 03 2005
   

       The guy in the drawing looks smug. He must be happy with his chest of drawers.
—Machiavelli, Mar 03 2005
   

       Wait till he bends over to pick up a screw and all his drawers full of parts fall out, including his ball bearing collection and this turns into a flat-on-your-ass invention.
—mensmaximus, Mar 03 2005
   

       [bristolz], I went to the FJ school of famous artists, as you can probably tell from my style. Unfortunately, I was out sick the day they taught human anatomy...
—robinism, Mar 04 2005
   

       [2fries], just look behind you.
—robinism, Mar 04 2005
   

       [Machi], He is the Halfbakery Guy in halfbakery land. He lives his whole life using halfbakery inventions in his imaginary world. So of course, he's smug. Also, that's the way I draw people looking downward at their drawers.
—robinism, Mar 04 2005
   

       [Mensmax], the drawers have a tight friction fit, which keeps them from falling out when the wearer bends over. Each drawer is rated for about one pound.
—robinism, Mar 04 2005
   

       [El D], the back of the chest unit is hinged at intervals, to allow it to conform to the contours of the body. (horizontal hinges between each row of drawers.) So anyone can wear it, to attractively accentuate his/her curves, as it stores his/her stuff.
—robinism, Mar 04 2005
   

       Ah, so you draw lots of people looking down at their drawers, do you? heehee.
—Machiavelli, Mar 04 2005
   

       To deal with the drawers-falling-out problem you could also notch them so you have to lift before you pull out, as in the cabins of sailboats.
—Etymon, Mar 04 2005
   

       Would you have some sort of concave inside version for those of us with boobies? If so a big +. If not, back to the drawing board.
—blissmiss, Mar 04 2005
   

       [Robinism] did I mention that I really like your drawing?
—dentworth, Mar 05 2005
   

       [blissmiss], this was a flaw in the originial design, so I corrected it by adding the hinged frame. The hinges allow the chest-unit to kind of drape over the body, like chain maille.   

       Since the weight of the drawers would still hug the body as it drapes, I would wear a good supportive bra under the chest unit, to save us from premature pendulitis.
—robinism, Mar 05 2005
   

       [dentworth], it would be unseemly to say "Thank you" so I'll just say I really like your drawings too (linked on your profile page). The croisoffa is especially light and buttery.
—robinism, Mar 05 2005
   

       can I say thank you?
—dentworth, Mar 05 2005
   

       :-)
—robinism, Mar 05 2005
   

       I have a tie that looks like flaked ceviche or tar and feathers, I'm not sure. I don't remember much about that night in the deep south at the sign of the flaming X roadside cafe after that slice of key lime pie.
—mensmaximus, Mar 06 2005
   

       I added some links that I think illustrate this quite well...
—k_sra, Mar 07 2005
   
      
[annotate]
   


 

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