h a l f b a k e r yA hive of inactivity
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I thought a cheetah's top speed might be for too short a distance, but it appears to be 1/4 of mile, or the length of a dog track... |
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Okay, you know the drill. I call it the 24 hours march of shame
where I leave it up for a day so people can see what
happened. |
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Sigh, thanks a1. Should have done a search. |
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What about if I do a weasel move and say the using
the profits from RESURRECTED 1930s cheetah
racing to preserve cheetah habitats is the new
idea, which I think technically it is. |
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1- Gets people thinking about cheetahs. |
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2- Generates money in an entertaining fashion. |
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3- HELPS cheetahs in the wild! |
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(Hmm, might be something neurological) |
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Okay, let me pick up that mic so I can drop it
again. |
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Get Frito-Lays on board. Have a commercial where
the Cheetos mascot, Chester Cheetah is munching
on that delicious snack that leaves your fingers
orange while watching the races. Something funny
happens, maybe he tries out and comically fails
but the end of the commercial says "10% of every
sale goes to Cheetah Habitat Races." |
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(gently sets mic down because this thing is starting
to get pretty dinged up) |
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JESUS CHRIST! I JUST REALIZED CHESTER THE
CHEETAH IS ALREADY WEARING RUNNING
SHOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AND YES I YELLED IT AT THE TOP
OF MY LUNGS FOR THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD TO
HEAR!! |
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How will you deal with cheating? |
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Hmm, cheating, does sound like cheetah, should
be a way to figure that into marketing... |
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"Don't be a cheata' when it comes to cheetah
habitat preservation, watch the cheetah races this
Sunday..." |
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Just use it as a regular occurring joke the
announcers use? |
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"AND CHARLIE CHEETAH TAKES FIRST PLACE! WHAT
A CHEETAH!" |
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"Hey, that's not fair, he won fair and square." |
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"No, I said he's a cheetah." |
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"Why would you call him a cheata', and frankly
Tony your Bronx accent makes you sound ignorant." |
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"How'd you like to ignorant ma fist in ya face?" |
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"Cheetahs are intelligent creatures, cunning hunters and
devastatingly uncompetitive." |
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That might be more of a problem than the cheating. |
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Now, if you could train cheetahs to review novels on late
night TV, you might be on to something. |
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I wouldn't even know what to feed the critters.
"Come on, eat your Cheetos." |
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Oh well, at least it's not a sniper bone. |
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“Leave a vote, leave a note.” Good HB public
service message. |
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