h a l f b a k e r yactual product may differ from illustration
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
Passengers queueing at check-in desks are gven a form to fill out. It's basically a set of tick-boxes, along the lines of:
"Are you a -
[ ] Doctor
[ ] Engaged/newlywed couple
[ ] Priest with doubts
[ ] Cute kid with life-threatening condition
[ ] Panic-prone rich guy
[
] Ex-pilot with drink problem
[ ] Member of <ethnic minority>
[ ] Unpleasant peron with irrational hatred of <ethnic minority>
[ ] Surprisingly brave and tough elderly person
[ ] Spoilt arrogant rich kid
[ ] Otherwise ordinary person with an unusual skill
?"
Forms are handed in on check-in and scanned. If more than six categories are found amongst passengers, a large red sign reading "QUOTA" starts to flash above the check-in and passengers are given the option of a different flight to avoid being embroiled in a situation that's "Just like a movie ..."
[] Nowhere to run
http://www.imdb.com...mmary?ref_=tt_ov_pl
[pashute, May 20 2016]
[link]
|
| |
[ ] Special Forces hand-to-hand combat expert travelling
anonymously on holiday
[ ] Generic movie computer
expert, able to hack into anything |
|
| |
[ ] Grotesquely fat, but with an extra tiny digit on one hand
equipped with a powerful organic sucker capable of extracting
a single electronic component from the bottom of an
otherwise inaccessible hole. It's unlikely but best to cover
every possibility.... |
|
| |
[ ] travelling with a briefcase handcuffed to arm
[ ] member of the aircraft's design team
[ ] sales rep with a sample case of innocuous items
|
|
| |
[ ] high school football team
[ ] group of inebriated sports fans, travelling to/from the big game
[ ] law enforcement agent with prisoner
[ ] pair of nuns |
|
| |
[ ] captain retiring after one last flight
[ ] unusually level-headed bombshell flight attendant |
|
| |
and don't forget:
[ ] fatalistic black guy, OK
with the idea that he'll die before all the white guys |
|
| |
If there were a way to source this information from one's social media profiles, an online facility might be built that, given pointers to various repositories, and a person's user_ids in each, would be able to determine, to within a half a standard-deviation, which from a list of common movie stereotypes, a person might most closely resemble. |
|
| |
Kind of like a meta one of those "which X are you most like" questionnaires, only not shit. |
|
| |
[] xenomorph egg
[] android
[] smarmy company executive
|
|
| |
<cranks on windlass handle/> |
|
| |
<large banner is hauled into view/> |
|
| |
"THIS IDEA IS NOT A CALL-FOR-LIST. A LIST WAS PROVIDED, BUT ADDITIONAL ITEMS WERE NOT ELICITED, EITHER IMPLICITLY OR EXPLICITLY. BorgCo, ITS SUBSIDIARIES, SERVANTS OR AGENTS, TAKE NO RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR ADDITIONAL CATEGORIES SUGGESTED IN ANNOTATIONS." |
|
| |
<points meaningfully at banner/> |
|
| |
<wonders where all the croissants are/> |
|
| |
<studiously ignores banner> |
|
| |
[] a rabbi
[] a priest
[] an imam
[] Irishman
[] Englishman
[] Scottsman
|
|
| |
Oh no sorry, that one's for drinking establishments. |
|
| |
<places croissant after blatant nudge> |
|
| |
Repetition ! You can't have "priest", it's in the original idea. |
|
| |
Oh, sorry, wrong game .... |
|
| |
[+] Milk
[+] Eggs
[+] oh... sorry |
|
| |
[ ] other...please describe: |
|
| |
<takes off sunglasses, sees banner, oops, casually puts sunglasses back on, strolls in opposite direction> |
|
| |
....[].............\
../ | \.........\...\
....>\..........=-===>
...| |_ o...../..../
.................../ |
|
| |
This is a list of very sorry annotations... |
|
| |
How could we forget:
[ ] cop with one day left on the force before retirement |
|
| |
[pashute] appears to have depicted a giant footballer with an
erection watching a plane leave. |
|
| |
[ ] A person with the surname Oveur. |
|
| |
Shortened to the Swedish Ove |
|
| |
[ ] A person that questions intrusive forms and puts wrong answers for kicks. |
|
| |