Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Canvas Grocery Vest

 One trip up the stairs
  (+3, -1)
(+3, -1) 		  [vote for,
against]

If I am alone with the baby and go shopping, I am faced with the delimma of how to get up the stairs with six plastic grocery bags and a twenty-six pound baby. Making two trips would require me leaving the baby alone, and making one trip just hurts, six bags in one hand and baby cradled in the other arm.

The canvas hook vest would be made of canvas with very stiff leather patches sewn into the sides. Retractable metal loops would be set into the leather patches and would swing out to a 45 degree angle to hang grocery bags (and diaper bags) on. The loops would be set about six and eight inches above the waist, so that the bags would not impede your stride. You could then hold the baby with both hands. The vest itself would have an easy velcro closure.

This would also be good if you were just lazy and wanted to get all of the groceries in one trip.

—Brackforn2, Sep 04 2002

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       I have no stairs, I have no babies, but I still want a grocery vest.
—half, Sep 04 2002
   

       Papoose? That way you can drop a grocery bag without dropping the baby.
—phoenix, Sep 04 2002
   

       (but blissy, if you'd had a canvas grocery vest, you might not have such an ailing back..)   

       by the way, B2, are you Mrs. Brackforn, or Brackforn's ghost?
—yamahito, Sep 04 2002
   

       Yamahito - The ghost of brackforn - The 1/2B wouldn't accept my old name after I deleted my old account (I reviewed my old ideas and decided that most of them were pretty ill-conceived), and suggested this one.   

       Bliss - My suggestion is based upon proper body mechanics because it keeps the load as close to the center of gravity as possible, and allows baby to be carried close to the body.   

       I just got a car and the baby is 19 months old. I have a large-wheeled stroller that literally has about a thousand miles on it. Here in New Orleans, it's about ninety degrees for a third of the year, and the humidity rarely drops below 85%.   

       I never, ever, park close to the grocery store, and neither does my wife. I have never understood people who will wait for ten minutes for a good parking spot instead of walking for two, baby or no. We barely have proper handicapped spaces down here. We certainly do not have "mommy" spaces. We big strong men are kind of expected to leave spaces available close to the store for those who might need them.   

       I hope that by the time my daughter hits her teens, she can be trusted to climb the stairs herself.
—Brackforn2, Sep 05 2002
   

       If you don't mind having your hands occupied - there are *handles with catches* for bags - kind of a *C* shape. Quite comfortable grip, and greater mass can be handled.
—thumbwax, Sep 05 2002
   

       I'd like one that reads "BABY ON BOARD" on the back so everyone will be ok with how poorly I walk.   

       Bliss- I second that bit about the parking spaces.   

       Also, what the heck are those gigantic bulbous green plastic things they attach to some of the carriages for kids to ride on all about? Is that necessary?
—gootyam, Sep 05 2002
   

       I like this. Chivalry often requires me to be carrying *all* of the shopping bags for my mother, sister and any of female friends. However, I am only human and can only fit so many stupid cheesewire-like handles into my grasp.   

       This vest will enable me to carry everything in one trip, I shall be king of the "lazy man's burden".
—Jinbish, Sep 05 2002
   

       I have back issues of "Guitarist" magazine from 1990 to 1998.
—angel, Sep 05 2002
   

       If we're using this as rant space then I think I should join in and announce the terrible failure of my internet shopping experiment.

Buying my groceries over the internet was great. I just slapped in my order and credit card number, chose the delivery time and viola! Problem was, I ended up getting two weeks of groceries and then eating them in a week so my shopping bill started going through the roof. Now I'm back to lugging plastic bugs onto the bus again. It's a pain in the arse but a fine method of budgetary control.

PS: angel, I think I'd rather read the back issues of 'Years of Gymnastics'. Better pictures!
—DrBob, Sep 05 2002
   

       You've never seen Lita Ford!
—angel, Sep 05 2002
   
      
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