h a l f b a k e r yThe Out-of-Focus Group.
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Screw the earth anchor firmly into the ground, clockwise. Stand the bottle of fine wine on the earth anchor and buckle it in with the leather straps. Screw the large rocket into the bottle’s cork by means of the rocket corkscrew, clockwise. Light the fuse and disperse to a safe distance.
With a “fshsh-plop-whsssss-boom!”
the rocket and cork should fly skyward followed by spectacular streaming red and gold sparkles. Decant and enjoy a wine with the slightest hint of fire and brimstone.
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Annotation:
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This would need a hugely powerful firework. Now where's Afro? |
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I'm all up for this with my reds, which I like on the warm side, but I don't know what my woman would think of the heat from the blast on her whites, which she prefers chilled. |
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Can the version for the whites be powered by compressed liquid nitrogen ? [+] |
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As long as no foam insulation breaks off and hits the bottle. |
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The neighbor who has your wine schedule worked out and always shows up to invite himself at the cocktail hour would find this handy. It would make it difficult to imbibe with any subtlety. |
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Add a Catherine Wheel to screw the corkscrew in, and I'll take a dozen. |
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