h a l f b a k e r yThe embarrassing drunkard uncle of invention.
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Yesterday I saw an otherwise nice new car with fresh bird
droppings across the window and roof. The impression was
that a large passing bird had scored a bullseye with a
double load of shit.
Idea: Large, removable, appliques in various
patterns of
slightly
raised fake bird droppings
molded in to be placed on
windscreen, door, trunk lid, etc to create revulsion in the
viewer to deter theft, touching or ever getting close. Such decals
can be kept in a folder in console or glove box until
needed.
Shit!
https://www.redbubb...eshi/59004567.EJUG5
Indeed. [whatrock, Apr 25 2021]
Prior art
Bird_20Poo_20Aerosol
From Wagster [whatrock, Jul 16 2023]
And here, sorta:
Bike_20Beauty_20Bugs
[whatrock, Jul 16 2023]
Plastic Vomit
https://www.bing.co...c+vomit&FORM=SHOPTB
[Voice, Jul 24 2023]
[link]
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Or just put a pair of gloves in that glove box and then go out
and steal cars at will? |
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Valuable stuff bird droppings, good fertiliser that, good idea
to deter it's theft. |
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Oh, I see, not that then. |
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[Faint smell of burning solder] |
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[Sound of grinding gears & a little smoke from the ears] |
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Why not just use real bird droppings, saves the
expense producing plastic molds. |
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You only have to apply it once too. |
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Left on & baked in the sun it should corrode the paint work
under it. |
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Which should be just as effective as the bird poop
after it gets washed off by the next rain. |
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Thinking further, the idea of applying (genuine or imitation) bird droppings to objects in order to deter theft is an idea with almost unlimitable potentiality. |
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^ Quite so. I stopped short of trying to replicate the entire
bird, a seed-stuffed sewn torso with silken wings askew,
recycled-plastic beak and life-like legs jutting out at odd
angles, having led a proper bird life but now lying
embarrassingly upside down across the hood in a slick of
the aforementioned, er, poop.
Hmm, might actually be a greater deterrent. |
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//Why not just use real bird droppings// |
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I once had an older car I should have taken better care of. Birds poo'd upon it and I ignored this. The poo ate through paint and primer and created rust. |
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Precisely [Voice], you need only apply once ;D |
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Bird droppings are lame. Exterior deterrents are bearable. How about a lifelike steaming puddle of upchuck on the driver's seat? No risk to the paint job and you can leave the car unlocked. Add a little extra deterrent for the passenger side; bloody upchuck flowing down the door from the open window. And you can leave the car unlocked. Comes in Italian or Stir-fry, with its very own under seat tote bag. They may get your tires but they won't drive away. |
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