h a l f b a k e r yNaturally, seismology provides the answer.
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An umbrella, with reinforced ribs, a range of camouflage
patterns and Aramid/Kevlar fabric, under which a
soldier,
journalist or non-combatant might shield their person
during times of war, violence and anarchy.
Dig a foxhole and open the Battlebrella over oneself to
create a small, unobtrusive,
water-, bullet- and shrapnel-
proof** tent.
**(For those expecting to be engaged by hostiles wielding
personal arms with calibres greater than 7mm or with
muzzle velocities exceeding 2000ft/s, we can offer a
range of borosilicate and silicon carbide reinforced
plates, that can be slipped inside the pockets under the
Battlebrella's canopy, to enhance your sense of personal
safety.)
Like water off a PanzerDuck's back.
HK kevlar mask
http://www.kittyhel...llet-proof-mask.jpg [not_morrison_rm, Apr 27 2012]
If Dupont makes it, you know it must be good.
http://images.icanh...673627876298231.jpg [2 fries shy of a happy meal, Apr 27 2012]
Umbrayonette
https://picasaweb.g...5468873128201554338 [xenzag, Apr 27 2012]
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Annotation:
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Burgess Meredith would be proud... needs a pole-mortar that shoots brella-flares, and an integral groundsheet. |
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Not bad, but kevlar is only bullet-resistant when there are
many layers, and less so when it's stretched taut. |
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We can offer a package of optional ceramic silicon
carbide plates to slip into the internal pockets, if you
want to carry them. |
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I'll take two, then. Does it come Coyote Brown? |
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Coyote Brown, Tactical Black (very popular), DPM,
DPCU, MARPAT, TACAM, ABU, OCP, Lizard, Type 99,
ACU, Multicam, AOR1, AOR2,
Woodland Digital, ERDL, TNI, M04, Ghillie... and
special orders, to your spec. |
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//less so when it's stretched taut// spring steel ribs should temporarily deform rather neatly |
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That would help. Kevlar works best when it's allowed to
freely deform as loose cloth does, second best when resin-
impregnated (under impact the resin fragments/pulverizes
and the textile deforms as normal). I'm not saying it
wouldn't work when stretched, just not as well (more
theorizing, actually). |
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// Ghillie // would have been my next request, though I
like to make my own. |
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If the structure was built as a quaternary tree (like a binary tree but moreso) with the very ends of the branches sticking directly into the kevlar layers... though (also theorizing) I don't see why spring or sprung ribbing shouldn't work: say enough deformation to stop a bullet within 6" travel. |
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The words "stop a bullet"* aside, that's pretty clever.
Better would be a mechanism that allows the panel to go
completely slack (within a limited range of travel) when
struck. |
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* Because they're prone to start an argument. You failed
to specify caliber, type, weapon fired from, range, wind
velocity, rhinoceros proximity, etc. |
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//You failed to specify...// I didn't have to; see post: shrug off assault-rifle fire and bulk up for battle-rifle situations. |
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Assault rifle fire will go through kevlar like paper. The best
it can handle on its own is a large-caliber handgun (yes I
see the bit about the plates). |
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From the title, I assumed this was some kind of
'Barbarella'-themed sexy combat robot. |
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//You failed to specify ...rhinoceros proximity, |
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or little men. Shockingly remiss. |
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Anyway, if you could do in Hello Kitty pink you could a two for one deal with the Hello Kitty kevlar mask. I should change for these great ideas... |
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I'm waiting for the reactive BattleBrella, for protection against RPGs (the GrenadeGamp?) |
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I was thinking of making it reactive or Chobham-type
but figured the issue of the weight penalty would
attract too much criticism from you lot. |
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They had one of these in the horrid 'Johnny English: Reborn' flick. Waste of an hour forty-five, it was. |
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[+] This might also be used in questionable neighbohoods even when it's not raining. (raining bullets?) |
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Yeah, must be a slow month |
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Making up for lost time. He's had four years to think up this
stuff. |
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To be honest, I'm a little worried about flooding the
place... there don't seem to be many active users
these days. I'm trying to "trickle" the ideas out, a
few at a time. Trouble with that is that you keep
forgetting the ones you don't post. |
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//I'm trying to "trickle" the ideas out// |
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You mean "squeeze", shirley? |
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//you keep forgetting the ones you don't post.// |
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Could you ask the nurse for a notepad and crayon? |
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No crayons since I ate the last lot. Rainbow shit for
three days. |
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//there don't seem to be many active users these days// |
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Yeah. I wonder what happened to [Zanzibar], for example. |
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