h a l f b a k e r yContrary to popular belief
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Barking Contest
Two contestants, doing their best dog imitation, bark at each other as loud as they can on stage, winner determined by audience applause. | |
The two contestants take to the stage behind their
microphones as the MC introduces them and asks a few
questions. "This is David Smith from Jonestown Ohio, hi
David!"
"Hi John! Great to be here."
"Now David, what makes you think you're a great barker?"
"Well John, I used to the sergeant
of my platoon in the
military and I now I'm an auctioneer so I've got a great
set
of lungs." (audience applause)
"And Mary Jones from San Diego California, how about
you
Mary?"
"I've got six kids John." (audience laughter)
When the MC says "Aaaand GO!" they begin, the clock
above the stage runs for 20
seconds during which time the contestants just bark as
loud as they can at the other party. Then the MC walks
out
and holds his hand over the head of the first contestant
and the
audience registers their vote by the volume of their
applause. Then to the other contestant to see how much
applause they get.
Winner gets something. Maybe the whole thing is
sponsored
by a cough drop company or something.
Sequoiadendron giganteum
https://en.wikipedi...iadendron_giganteum
More bark than you can shake a stick at. [8th of 7, Apr 02 2020]
Barking competition
https://www.youtube...watch?v=jvUuMsLsGuk
6 minutes 30 seconds in [DenholmRicshaw, Apr 02 2020]
Possible venue
https://en.wikipedi...ing_Learning_Centre
[pocmloc, Apr 04 2020]
Pig squeeling contest #1...
https://www.youtube...watch?v=AmEBhQVqzDE
[doctorremulac3, Apr 04 2020]
#2
https://www.youtube...watch?v=MUOf_VpKw9A
[doctorremulac3, Apr 04 2020]
...etc
https://www.youtube...watch?v=3AsrCZdzvAY
[doctorremulac3, Apr 04 2020]
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Annotation:
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"And the winner of the biggest bark contest is ..." |
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"... Sequoiadendron giganteum !! " |
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We have a new contender: the Magdalene Vinnen II, a
117.5m long German barque. |
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Oh great, a shouty Kraut ... |
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Done in plasticine - see link |
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I think that there would be unfair bias from which was applauded first and which second. There are good statistical studies of this kind of sequential bias in competitions. I would say it's important to have some kind of simultaneous option thing to rank the contestants. Perhaps people should clap with one hand or the other uppermost to indicate their preferred contestant, or something like that. |
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Simultaneous voting would probably be fairer. |
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Put a vertical barrier between the two contestants. Give every audience member a golf ball. On the instruction "Vote now !", the audience throw their golf balls at one contestant or the other. |
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The golf balls on each side are then counted, and the contestant with the most injuries is the winner. |
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Of course, the World Championships would have to be staged on the North bank of the River Thames, between Poplar and Dagenham ... |
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Did I say clapping? I meant the crowd should bark. |
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// Winner gets something // |
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Nothing worthwhile, then. |
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If somebody's really bad you meow them off stage. |
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Do you mean barking as in dog, or barking as in carnival? (If this is specified elsewhere, my apologies for missing it.) |
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South of the Manson-Nixon line, will there be "Squeal like a pig" contests ? |
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And believe it or not... (links) |
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